𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅𝐈𝐒𝐇 - 𝐃.𝐌

one

"Hey guys," Josephine sat down next to Blaise, who was obviously flirting with Meredith. "Hey Josie. What's with the sad eyes?" Pansy asked, who had noticed the long face Josephine couldn't help but bring.

It was Draco. Draco was the reason of her sadness. The reason she walked in the room with puffy eyelids and a stuffy nose. The reason she didnt want to be around him anymore.

"Nothing, I'm just tired." She sighed and took a bite of the apple she held in her hand. "Are you sure?" Meredith asked and she gave a small smile. "Yeah, I'm sure."

Josephine had always had a hard life, and Draco knew this. But today, he took it too far.

"I don't want to fight with you." She said as calmly as she could. "I don't either!" Draco said as he hanged his coat up. "You're fighting with me right now! Why? Because I'm trying to tell you how I feel!" She said she stood up from the bed.

"You're always feeling some kind of way anyway! It's like hearing the same shit over and over!" Now, Josephine was cornered. She always hated being in the corner, she felt ignored.

She shoved him out the way, shaking her head. "I'm leaving." She grabbed her things and slipped in her shoes. "Leave! That's what you do anyway. Go on, leave! You really are your mothers daughter."

Josephine had froze. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, giving her all to not break down in cry at that moment. "Fuck you!" She said as she grabbed one of Draco's quidditch trophies and threw it at him.

He blocked it though, but she still had silently cursed herself for not having a better aim. "You know what, Hemsworth? I cant live like this anymore. You're like a constant maggot nagging my brain. We're done. Grab your shit and leave."

That was when she left.

It had been like that for months.

"Draco broke up with me. For real this time." She mumbled as her tears had started to make their way down her cheek. "What? Why?" Pansy asked as she handed Josephine a napkin to wipe her tears.

"I don't know." She said as she set her apple down and looked to stare in Meredith's eyes. "Josie, I'm sorry." Blaise stammered in, an obvious sorrow written onto his face.

Draco would always talk about Josephine to Blaise. He would talk about her like she was a goddess, a temptress. He would always look at her like she was a piece of glass, threatening to break if someone laid a heavy finger.

Josephine stood up from the table and left, running to her dorm. She shut the door and took deep breaths, but his absence was slowly killing her in a way she didn't know. She hurt like never before, and if the prior breakups were just to prepare her, it wasn't enough as she slid down the door, clutching her chest so tight she thought she'd explode.

She felt like a girl that was never really loved in the right way, and Draco knew that. He took care of her and loved her the way she should've been loved. She felt at home whenever he was around, but it still destroyed her at times.

Josephine's heart was full of love, but her head was full with fear. She loved the chaos created within hers and Draco's relationship because she held that in her. Draco taught her to live and love with her heart and not her head.

He taught her not to be scared of the person she was and was becoming. He taught her how to love, how to be herself. He liked when she took the facade within her and broke the walls she had built which held her in shambles.

And with Draco gone, Josephine felt empty. Her head full of thoughts and her heart dark. He looked at her like she was something beautiful, more than beautiful even. He made her feel beautiful. Seem beautiful.

From her head to her toes, from her mouth to her nose, he made her feel like she could breathe without feeling like a balloon ready to pop.

Once she had stopped crying, she closed her eyes and for a split second, she swore she saw him again. But once they opened, he was gone.

She wanted to scream. She wanted to scream til her lungs gave out and her throat became dry. She still felt his eyes burn in the back of her head as she walked out, heart full of sorrow and head full of anger.

That was two months ago.

'I can do this,' she told herself.

She knew she couldn't, but it had to be done one way or another, right?

She had all his things in a box. What happened to us?, she asked herself. 'We were perfect for eachother,' but she accepted defeat. "Perfect doesn't mean it's worth it." She sighed to herself and grabbed the box, opening the door and heading to the door.

Those two months were the worst she had experienced. Constant panic attacks and nightmares to the point where she had to have Meredith sleep in the same bed. She's wake up in a sweat and start to cry.

She missed him, and she wished she could hold him and explain how much she missed him.

But now she was here, knocking on his door. He opened it and his smile dropped, his eyes becoming sadder and sadder with each glance she snook. "Come in." He said and she cleared her throat, heavy footsteps dragging her down. "Here's everything." She said and he pressed his lips together. "Hey, um, I'm sorry." He said and she smiled lowly. "The past is the past." She said before turning around.

As she walked out the door, he asked a question that made her stop in her tracks.

'Do you still care about me?'

"I guess so. Do you care about me?" She said nonchalantly, a wave of guilt coursing through her veins as she prepared herself for the harsh truth. "What does 'I guess so' mean? Even after the breakup?" He asked,

"Yeah. I mean, It killed me, and sometimes I wonder if you feel as miserable as I do. But then I'm being selfish."

"Why selfish?"

"I know it's selfish that I want you to." Was all she said as he stared into her eyes.

He tried to push the grief that was lingering around them away, letting his judgment cloud his brain.

Draco acted like everything was okay after they broke up. At least he tried to.

He had insomnia for an entire month. He couldn't sleep as he thought about the way it ended.

They both had tried anything to rid them of eachothers touch and memories until the thought of them together again was only a dull ache in the pit of their stomachs.

But they both never realized how much a person can miss something or someone til it's right infront if your eyes.