Karma

Proud

I will not say I'm proud of my actions, nor would I say I wouldn't do it all over again. But they deserve what they got. I was like the avenging Angel if one my say. I was doing what Karma was taking to long to do, I was changing them to be better and to be more understanding. But let's stay with a little background. First my name is Za'Nia Mariah Frances but, Nia is good to. I'm a 26 year old who works in education I guess. I came from a loving family of two people who made it out the hood by hard work. My mom had her first kid, my sister Logan, at 15 and my dad was 17. Then another girl Maria at 18 and 20. And me at 21 and 24. So they really need t make something shake. My dad had a college degree in per law already while my mother was in college for biology. After my mom was done my dad went to law school and my mom became a nurse for a bit. After he was done she went to law school for to become a hospital lawyer so did with Mal practice lawsuits,  hospital insurance frauds and stuff like that. My dad was a real estate lawyer for a bit until moving to divorce law in which he became very known. They became a power house couple never lost a case to this day. 
We moved out the hood and then out Chicago once I turned about 8 years old and my mother got pregnant again with my twin bothers James and Jamel. To upstate New York, and life changed. My dad was making so much money and my mom became a stay at home mother for a while. We was able to get a big ass house that was way to big for just the seven of us so what do my mom do, have more kids was against any pregnancy. She adopted my older brothers Quincy, and Jordan. My younger sister Faith and my baby brothers Loyol and Michael, she at the age of 44 was now pregnant with my twins Zion and Zola. So I'm total I had six brothers and four sisters. It was so many of us both sets grandparents moved in to the neighborhood to help. We are very close and often talk every other day. Due to the busy schedules I often did things alone going up, not that I had to but, because I wanted to. My mom had so much going on and I didn't want to bother her if I didn't have to. My dad worked and when he came home he tended to my mother mostly as we was already asleep. If we wasn't then he would spend time with us.
But, since I spent my time doing my own thing, I just put myself into everything. Sports, clubs, classes and more. My grandpa would drive to my events, I like it because it gave me time to spend with him. And his stories were so funny and wild. But that's how I me Chole my best friend, I went to ballet class and she was ther in the most sparkly leotard and tutu I ever seen. And just like that I knew she was going to be my best friend. We spent the next days bedazzling my black leotard and tutu and anything else we could find.

Chole life was fabulous if you asked her, she lived with her mother, sister and stepfather who was a pro football player. They lived in a big house like I did but, it was only four of them. She went on trips all over the world and for the summer always went to Italy by her father. Her bio dad wasn't always around as her mom was a total bitch, anytime I heard of him she was bashing him. However Chole never had anything bad to say about her father, she only said good things. How he brought her whatever, how he would read to her and play tea party with her. I'm high school she stopped, she became like her mother. She only talked about how he wouldn't but her another car or how he wouldn't buy her mom a new house despite him paying for the one she was living in. To me they where ungrateful and spoiled but, again I never met him nor knows to much about him.

While I didn't grow up as privilege as Chole I was  to raised spoiled, but my parents made sure I understand hard work went into me be able to get things and understand everyone didn't have it so easy. I made sure to not ask my parents for much and work for my things once I got older. Whether it was doing house work for my mom or work for families in the neighborhood as a babysitter. I loved being about to hand my own hard earn money over when I paid for things I wanted. I wouldn't lie and say them being who they are didn't help but, it's about using your advantage to get somewhere. Using who you know and once your there your able to help other. Which is what I did, I used my parents money and status to get into programs and connected with people to help others. Especially under pervillage black kids. While I went to law school I worked for a program that help low income students get a better education. Thought my parents I was able to pull so many donors to support us, giving the kids so many opportunities to do things and get things they need. If families came in for support we gave it, it didn't matter if f it was help with citizenship or bills needed to be paid. We made a way to support these kids. We was rich kids trying to used our privilege to help others and Chole never understood that. She saw it as an hand out and them being lazy.
I never really understand why, since her whole life was a hand out and her being lazy. She dropped out of college despite her parents risking their career to pay the college for her to go to. She didn't work nor wanted to, which I didn't blame her. Sometimes having a job was tiring. But she made it seem as low income people was so horrible for getting help while, not lifting a finger to even wipe her ass, anthor story for a different day.
But I ignored all that because she was my friend. She was my yin to my yang, the white to rice as she would say. I loved her so much, her ignorance and hate kinda just went ignored. I was so blinded by a sisterhood I made up in my head. While other knew and saw what I refused to. My mom hated her, with a passion. And when a black mother dislikes you they don't care what you do to be nice to them, they will still dislike you. My mom was hood as hell, grew up in the worst part of Chicago and she could read a person from a mile away, just like my grandmother. She met Chloe one time and told me "you stay away from that little white girl. She only gonna cause trouble." But me being like my grandpa decided I was not gonna let her be one of the so called troubles. I gave her a chance and just like my big heart grandpa got bit in the ass. So bad I couldn't even stomach the pain. And just like my grandpa the pain started to turn into hate and anger.

Now while my grandpa met me grandma and she was able to led him into a much better place and stop him from doing what he wanted. I was not able being played with, I refused to allow a white bitch how can't even read a fucken book to save her life disrespect me and so publicly. It was like she wanted me to do my worse and that is just what she was gonna get. But, as time went on, and hearing from my other friends and family I decided I had two choices. To get revenge and make her pay a price far more wraps then what she did to me or forgive her and move on and let karma take it over. I thought about it for maybe a week or so, I decided to just let it go. I removed myself from the pain and anger. I did my own things and grew.

I got a new life, grew closer to my friends and learned so much about myself. I treaveld and did shit I didn't even realize I wanted to do. I met so many people and connected with so many kids and families. I started my own foundation for young women of color, with my older sister Maria and a couple of her friends. We was doing the things, we was make spaces for people of color. And all this was due to me not having a bitch on my back who was telling me they didn't deserve it, it was dude to me not having to go home and take care a nigga who was going no where in life. It was due to me redirecting my anger and pain over to my work. So while yes they cause so much pain, they lit a fire in me to do better for myself.

However, as time went on karma was just taken to long. It was almost as of karma wanted me to handle it. It was almost if she was giving me so many reasons to just do it myself. So many opportunities as well. My friend Ryan and sister Maria said it was a test maybe but, I never been one to pass those on the first try and this wasn't gonna be no different. The difference was I actually was studying on how to fail. I was studying on what would hurt them the most, what would cause me the most joy in seeing them fall so low and it hit me MONEY!

Both were so lazy they didn't have a soured of income only living off other so if I could cut those then they would out of shits luck. If I could take away they support systems and make them see just how hard life really was they might change and be better people is what I told myself. So if we think about it like that I'm really doing something good. Like I'm making them better people, who could really tell me what I was doing was wrong at that point.