"there are turtles dying in the ocean do NOT eat that plastic"
"pistachio? isnt that the bitch whos nose grows?"
"if i sneezed that hard you might aswell plan my funeral right then and there"
"i'll bust a nut for crepes"
"no mom i dont want to go to the cheesecake factory!"
"sometimes i pretend i pretend to pretend yk?"
"cup and mug together is mup and cug"
"pussy move fr"
"wait is that like an asylum for people who like country music?"
"the mountain lions are r@c1st"
"im scribbling with a purpose"
"i should go by dante so on fem days i can go by dan masc days by te and in between days i can go by dante"
"i just found a joke about taxes funny, i think im catching middle aged woman-itis"
"you shouldn't be an actor bc everyone will see how pale you are"
"you look like a used tampon"
"his brains worth 5 mil bc its never been used!"
