wish you were gay | billie eilish

7 | new for me

continued..

billie pushed me off, got up and left out of my apartment.

i just stood there and stared at the wall, in disbelief. my own damn friend... has a crush on me??

i was startled by the sound of a door opening in my place. it was the bathroom door. just that quick, i had forgot margie was in there.

she heard everything.

"i swear to god, whatever you have to say-"

"oh shut up," she cut me off. "i'm not about to say 'i told you so.'"

"you just did," i walked over and plopped on my couch.

"are you okay?" she sat next to me.

"no. how did i not know?" i face palmed.

"honestly, i have no idea. cause she made that shit clear as daylight," marg rubbed my shoulder.

"marg," i looked at her with sadness in my eyes, not in the mood for humor. "i think i hurt her."

"you think??" she furrowed her eyebrows. "was the crying not confirmation enough?"

"get out."

"no," she chuckled. "i'm sorry."

"what am i gonna do?"

"make it right with her," she told me.

"how? i already told her the truth. i'm not into girls."

"you sure?" she rose her eyebrows.

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"i've been in your life for years now. and i've never seen you talk about a friend of yours the way you talk about billie."

"what? how?"

"you're always going on about how sweet she is. how caring. how pretty. you literally said you wish jacob was like her." margie explained. "don't you see it lei? i think you may like her and you don't even realize it."

"stop," i shook my head.

"and you despise her boyfriend."

"that's cause he was rude as fuck. otherwise i don't care about them being together," i shrugged.

"have you ever seen her with him in person?"

"no i haven't seen him since i met him."

"exactly," she started. "who knows how you'd feel if you actually saw them together."

"mar- no that's crazy. ive never had a thing for a girl ever, and you think it's just gonna happen now?"

"um yeah it can work like that," margie made a straight face at me.

"but im with jacob."

"but is jacob with you?" she asked me in an exhausted tone.

i furrowed my eyebrows and blinked at her, being kinda offended.

"just think about it lei," marg grabbed her bag and headed towards my door. "i love you," she looked at me before walking out.