Artist in Denial [poems and short stories]

Bittersweet

Your turning into the rest of them.
Your drifting away like the rest of them.
Right now there's a invisible wall between us and no matter the anger I feel.
The unbearable insufferable anguish that's misplaced itself in the burrows of the blood vessels I own.
I can not drive myself away from like you do with me.
It's impossible to distance myself even id like to..
You made me into something that I never would've thought I would be.
Apart of me hates this.
And the other loves it.
Again despite the agony I feel just from the mere displaced thought that I was never enough to meet your standards I stick apart like a parasitic leech.
mooching off of your love and giving back all I have left in these empt arms I own..
What is there to give if my arms are empty?
What if all I am giving is just parts of me?
Would that be enough to solve the hunger?
The pain?
The loneliness?
Would you feel the need to find someone else to fill those gaps I can not reach?..
Am I not enough to fill those gaps?
A repeated question lurks in my mind if I will ever be enough to meet your satisfaction
And I may not be the best!
But I at least I can say that nothing was made up!
Every thought I've ever had from the time we met from now has included you and the mere thought of letting you makes me burn in what feels like acid!
I'm in an intoxicating warfare with myself and I can't get out! Will you lead me out the way I do for you! I sure as hell doubt it!
Cause no matter how bad it gets I can't find the need to ask for you help.
When I'd rather help you and oh don't you worry. I'll be fine eventually.
A cold and bittersweet taste in my molars
Times go by slower.
That bittersweet tastes is a toxic fume in my words..
that make this paragraph so distinctively mad
That make it so bittersweet.