The Thing // Mark & Cesar

Chapter VI - Am I

The thing Mark was accompanied with wasn't an it anymore. The more he thought about it, the more the alternate was so similar to Cesar. The mannerism - the alternate was holding his own keys to try and help because it knows it can't cool him down by comforting. Hell, it probably didn't even know how to comfort or what it was.

Mark felt strangely safe around the creature. It looked like Cesar. Something deep inside him was definitely hating it, but Cesar's aura was still there. It was a feeling he couldn't even describe himself. It was...

Bittersweet.

It made him so happy that the thing that was holding his keys looked like Cesar and acted like Cesar. Its speech was like his friend, and he couldn't take it. His sub-consciousness reminding him that it wasn't actually Cesar. It couldn't be. Because Cesar is dead. It was... Such a bittersweet feeling. And it was overwhelming him.

Mark tried to internally ground himself as he grabbed one of the keys. He watched the doppelgänger drop the keys into his own hand, letting Mark take ownership of them again. The alternate carefully watched him fondle with the keys. It listened to the noises of the keys clanging against each other, and then watched Mark jam it into the lock and twist the key vigorously. 

It felt like the alternate hasn't seen him do this a million times. It definitely feels stranger in person. Feels weird right in front of him like the creature is just another human. And the alternate liked being a human. It was comfortable. It didn't feel like it was being controlled by that evil man anymore. It... 

It felt free.

As the alternate whipped back from its thoughts, Mark was gone. The door was wide open. It felt the opposite of welcome. Despite being comfortable around the human, something told it deep down that it shouldn't step foot in the house. It felt like it couldn't trust Mark. At this point, it couldn't trust itself anymore.

But it walked in anyway. It was like it had a devil and angel on both of its shoulders. It felt like you had to choose between your gut or your heart. And the alternate didn't have both of those things. It definitely didn't. It was barely alive after Mark shot it and tied it down.

It knew it didn't have feelings. Its owner would never give it the chance to feel the same as any human. And it's both a curse and a blessing. It won't be able to feel grief, sadness, loneliness... But it could never feel the way a human felt their happiness. It couldn't experience euphoria, joy, excitement. It felt dull. But it couldn't even feel that at all. It was just... there. It just existed. And there was nothing more to add.

Mark's house was, in all honesty, just an average house that you'd see from any other person in the neighbourhood. But it stood out somehow. The mantlepiece on top of the electric fireplace was filled with pictures. A baby picture of him smiling, which that smile was now wiped away, and it has been for God knows how long.

A family picture. Mark, his mother, his father, and his little sister. All were gone. They did not live in the same house as Mark anymore, but it was clear that Mark desperately wants to visit them. It was concerning for an 18 year old to be so distant from his family. Mark placed his keys on top of the mantlepiece as well, small keychains from amusement parks decorating them. 

Mark collapsed on the sofa, groaning as he leaned his head back. His eyes were shut tight. And he hoped he wouldn't be able to open them again. He slammed both of his hands on top of his face, groaning again. He knew this alternate was going to be a pain... But it felt nice to have company ever since his family passed away.

Without taking his hands off of his face, he took a little look at the side of the sofa. He could feel the sofa move under him as 'Cesar' sat down at his right side. It was an awkward situation. All of it. Almost got killed by a creature that's going to be living inside of his home. How lovely.

"Hey, Mark?" ... "Hm?"

"Am I only here because I look like Cesar to you?"