in which, jordan asks
for love and affection.
jordan gets attached easily. at home, he preferred being outside and doing what he wanted to do which resulted of him not getting affection at home.
his mother wasn't really around since she was working which he appreciated of her doing, but leaving her son with attachment issues.
so when symere came into his life, everything turned 360. he felt at peace with him, going on two tours with him—a lot of sex and fucking happened backstage.
he wanted something happened between them but symere refused. he thought he had someone that would love him.
"symere i love you. what you mean?" jordan voice cracked, picking up his shirt.
symere snatched the shirt away from him, "jordan i said what i said. we are over. i can't hide this for any longer."
"NOBODY FUCKING TOLD YOU TO GET WITH HER!" he shouted, feeling himself getting very angry. he just want to have him for himself...
"jordan if we being honest, both of our fanbases is lowkey homophobic. they wouldn't like to see us together. let's face it—we went through a lot but it's coming to an end now."
jordan felt himself crying, "after three years symere, i went through everything with you..."
"i know and i'm sorry. this is for the better for myself." symere sighed before grabbing his phone and leaving.
jordan let his tears as he was standing butt naked, slowly moving to get his stuff around the room. he couldn't believe everything.
it was 2019. he was healing the fact his lover was gone. half of his whole was missing and he needed to pick up the pieces up to make everything completed again.
he still saw symere around but didn't have a bunch of conversations with him. he still kinda figured symere would have his name all in his mouth after the media haven't see them together. it's been years that everyone saw them together and jordan refused to talk about him.
he sighed while he stands outside flicking a cigarette as he looked up a night sky, a cool breeze coming through.
in his all black clothing, down to the balenciaga boots, made someone catch them in their eye.
"jordan, what you doing out here?"
he turned around to his little fling, frank, standing in the doorway.
"i needed fresh air... my ptsd kicked in." he sadly smiled.
he knew frank because of rocky when he first signed to awge. he always thought frank was handsome but always stayed loyal to symere.
that's where he went wrong at since look where he's at now.
"..you wanna talk about it?"
"no, i'm going to be fine." he flicked the cigarette ashes off and dragged it once again.
"just know i'm here for your jordan. that's what friends do," frank held on the pinky of jordan's, jordan tensing up at the contact.
"...i'm still dealing with the pain from being with symere." jordan bit his lip as he turned to the man, "all i wanted was my little fairytale where i could be happy and live at peace. i loved him s-so much..."
jordan felt his wall breaking down as he never cried like this in awhile.
"i just wanted to be loved. i didn't get that type of attention when i was younger..." jordan wiped his tears as he flicked his cigarette away.
