'and i can still see it all in my mind... all of you, all of me, intertwined. i once believed love would be black and white, but it's golden.'
Samira Mayfield is forced to move to a new town, transfer to a new school, and make new friends two months...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
CHAPTER THREE — this is me swallowing my pride...
✧
It's been a little over a week since the day that Max and I got into that fight and I haven't had a sip of alcohol since. It's been hard to say the least. And what I've been doing since then is apologizing to the people around me for all the unnecessary pain I've caused and mending friendships. Which has led me here, on the front steps of the last person I want to see. And the last person who would ever want to see me. I knock on the door nervously, taking a small step back. While I stand there waiting, I begin to crack my knuckles and my head turns in every direction, anxiety pulses through my veins. I hear the handle start to turn and my head snaps forward. The door opens revealing the person I haven't seen in a while. "H-hey, hi."
"Hi?" He asks more than says. I take a deep breath and swallow the lump in my throat.
"Listen, uh, I came here to apologize." I start. "I know that nothing I say will make up for what I did...to you. But you deserve something. I'm sorry, Steve. I let myself get lost in grief and I didn't care about who I hurt. It's no excuse. But I'm a lot better now and I want- I needed to apologize."
"Thank you." He breathes. "I'm glad that you're doing better and I really hope that you continue to do so. You deserve to be happy." I look down, my hand moving to my back pocket, ready to pass along the letter. The letter that says all the things that I can never put into verbalize. "But, Sammy, I really don't think there's anything here, between us, anymore. And I can't just be your friend. It's just too hard." My arm falls, leaving the envelope in its place.
"Understandable. Well, uh, I should get going. See you around, Steve." And with that I turn away from him and return to my car. He stands in the doorway, until I pull back onto the road. I drive as fast as I can, entering the apartment and rushing past her and Max, right towards my room. I shut the door and fall against it. How stupid can I be? I mean, just because I stopped drinking and other people have forgiven me and things are back to normal with them, doesn't mean that he would. I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up. I'm such an idiot. I lift my body away from the door and remove the letter from my pocket. I get lost staring at it, that I don't hear Max enter. She places a hand on my shoulder, pulling me from my trance.
"Are you okay?"
"Hm? Oh, yeah." I speak softly, forcing a smile. I open my bottom desk drawer and drop the envelope inside. "I apologized. He thanked me. Things are fine. It feels good to know that he knows how sorry I am."
