mcyts x reader angst

Thaw

❗️this is not my story, all credits goes to the original author Lice_eater on ao3❗️

trigger warnings:
- anxiety attack
- panic attack

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Chapter 1: The Village

When there's a rough knock at the front door, I nearly fall out of my chair at the sound. I had been absentmindedly stirring my cup of tea beside me and reading a book on sea guardians when the jarring sound permeated the silence that I have become so used to. My eyes freeze on the page before flicking up to the now ominous door, limbs stuck in fear. No one ever comes to my house. The villagers aren't interested in history, or science, or even fictional stories; they only deal with their day to day business exchanges and simple farms. It's been years since someone has been interested in visiting my library - it makes me sad to look at my shelves and shelves of books full of knowledge that nobody seems to want to read.

Yet, I'm not quite as happy as I had expected to be now that someone actually is at my door. Mostly just full of dread. Whenever I am sought out by the villagers, it's never too... pleasant. Another round of harsh knocking at the door causes me to yelp and scurry into action, cautiously approaching the door. I quickly grab my small iron dagger on the side table and hide it in my waistband, just to be safe. Along with the dagger, I grab my snow hat and slip it on over my ears, hiding them from view; I do the same with my tail by pulling it into my pants. With the mystery visitor still knocking aggressively, I gather my courage and open up my thick oak door.

The man before me stands with his fist still raised to the door, finally lowering it when we make eye contact. My eyes widen to saucers as I crane my head up; he is definitely not from around here.

The height is the first thing I notice, with the man being well over a foot taller than me and surely towering over even the tallest villager I know. His mask is the next detail that catches my eye, making me shiver in fear. Hollow black eyes of a boar's skull seem to watch my every move, sharp tusks protruding out from the bone which hides the stranger's face down to his mouth, which peeks through the bottom. Long pink hair can be seen from the sides of the terrifying mask, laying over his shoulder in a messy braid. The height, muscular build, scary mask, and purple weapons hanging at his hip all work together to make my ears press flat against my scalp.

Danger. Hide.

"Are you the librarian?" I snap my head back up at the deep, monotonous voice. While he definitely didn't sound happy, disinterested is better than hostile, right? I will my heartbeat to calm down and nod hesitantly, fingers slightly trembling near my hip bone to access my weapon. Although, I've never actually used it on someone; this guy could most certainly beat me in a fight within seconds. I try to not so visibly shake in fear.

"Villagers said you'd have some books on brewin' that I could borrow." I stare dumbly at the man for a few seconds before registering his words. Someone wants a book! I know about brewing! Even with the stranger's incredibly intimidating and large stature, his non-threatening tone is enough to convince me that he really is just here because this is my job and he needs a book. This is my job, I quickly reprimand myself, maybe if you do it right, this man won't think you're the failure your village thinks you are.

I swiftly step back and beckon him inside with a soft 'please, come in!', hoping he doesn't notice the shake in my voice. He taps each boot on the doorframe, shaking the snow off before taking heavy steps inside my small cottage. The room suddenly feels a lot smaller with his head just inches from the ceiling.

"The, uh, brewing section is right over here. Oh, please excuse my mess," I mumble as I hastily gather my small breakfast and bring it away to the kitchen. I really was not expecting any visitors! Nice first impression, very professional. I hover in the doorway, watching as he doesn't even spare me a glance before intently skimming the spines of my brewing guides. "Take as long as you need, feel free to ask me any questions!" I clasp my hands together tightly and feel a flush on my cheeks; the adrenaline of having a strange new guest in my library is making me all jittery. It is debatable whether the jitters are from having a non-negative human interaction for once, or from the fear that he will use those weapons against me. Or just as easily overpower me with his bare hands. It really wouldn't take much-