Creeps And Weirdos | Various JJBA X Fem!Reader

7| Cupid and Not-Cupid

One person found themselves lucky enough to be audience to Valentines tirade of excitement. A partner! He squealed. I have found one, finally! Joy is within my grasp.

This person did not find it within themselves to particularly care about his excitement, they flicked their wings in hopes he'd get the message. Somehow, he saw that as a 'go on' and exploded into mumbling mess of laughter and squeals.

"Perfect, perfect! There's so much space for her too!" Valentine yelled, perhaps loud enough for the whole building to hear. "I can keep her, here! Keep her here, yes, because why not!"

It was then this person finally gave him an ounce of attention, setting their book gently to the side in a manner of concern. They perched their elbows onto their knees and leaned, as if to brace themselves for the shit-show their guest was building up.

"Keep what here?" They asked softly, as if a mother asking what creature their child had snuck into the house.

"Her! Oh, I've just told you everything about her!"

"You're kidnapping another woman to be your wife? And how did the last one turn out again? I think you'll need to remind me." They said, before widening their eyes comically in faux surprise. 

"Oh, wait. How could I forget. She turned out to be a lesbian."

"It's not like that this time!" The King of Valentine screeched, and returned to his manic pacing. "I tell you, Giorno, it's different! I really like her, and I think she really likes me!"

Giorno sighed and palmed his face, holding his hand there for just a minute in hopes it would somehow erase the mess he's been dragged into. But it doesn't. So he rises from his grand chair and walks over to Valentine in a way he hopes does not reveal his true thoughts. 

Giorno happened to be Valentines assistant and advisor, something he both dreaded and enjoyed. The reward for his work is undoubtedly amazing for the fact that the work is so awful.

"You have just met this person." He said. "There is no way in the heavens that they actually feel for you in the way you do for them."

"Yes she does!"

"--And trapping her here will make her like you more? Because I feel it would have the opposite effect, just like last time."

"But I do not want her to go back to that door. I want her to stay with me, here."

"You're going to make her resentful, Valentine. She must already feel some way knowing you're no cupid like the others. What if she's not as kind as you think she'd be? What if she truly doesn't care for your feelings because of your looks?"

Valentine paused his stomping and swiveled on his foot, baring his teeth in a nasty look that, while didn't make Giorno shudder, definitely made him wary of his safety. "You haven't even seen her! It would be I judging her if this was a contest of who was more freakish!"

"Valentine..." There came a soft sigh that spilled forth from Giorno's lips, and he leaned onto the body of his desk with a sort of fatigue only someone that deals with Valentine can suffer from. 

"Ignore her for the moment, and think about this. We're still freaks. By all accounts, you are still a devil among cupids, and I, myself, a cupid incapable of love. Almost everyone in this building is cursed for reasons outside of our knowledge and it will stay that way."

Valentine huffs and allows that little brain of his to actually think, a rare sort of occurrence as Giorno likes to describe it. 

"I'd like to remind you that your distaste to affection is no curse," He says in a break of thought, "Romance isn't for everyone, and just because you're a cupid does not mean you are required to burden yourself with the feelings of another person. I'd even go so far as to say you're blessed to not have such a leash around your throat."