Love Hate Relationship

Chapter 78

The next night after work, Clarke was snuggled between her two besties. It was the second Clarke sandwich in the last month. Three gloomy faces stared at nothing.

"Are you sure?" Raven asked.

"As sure as you can be," Clarke said.

"Maybe it was wrong. Tests are wrong all the time," O offered.

"No, the chances are extremely slim, like barely possible. And I puked twice. And I just know. I can't describe how, but I do."

Raven was practically inconsolable. "But you just grew your lady balls," she said dejectedly. "It has to be wrong. It was wrong. Take it again."

"Rave, I took it twice."

Raven brushed a hand at watery eyes, sniffling.

Clarke turned to look at her.

"Allergies. I have allergies."

"What are you going to do?" O asked.

"I'm gonna talk to Finn tonight. Tell him I'm willing to give it another try. For the baby."

Raven yelped in emotional pain, "No! What about Lexa? Yesterday you were all high on life, because she rocked your world this past weekend. Your exact words by the way. Are you just gonna throw that away?"

"Rave, I have to think of the baby. It's the best thing for my child."

"No!" Raven wailed.

Octavia reached across Clarke to pat her girlfriend's leg in sympathy. "Maybe Lexa will want to have the baby with you," Octavia said.

"You want me to ask a woman, that I've only known for four months, to raise a baby with me?"

"Yes," Raven stated, rather loudly. "Yes, that's what you should ask."

"You're ridiculous. Nobody has a baby with someone they barely know. It's not fair to even ask Lexa. Babies are a lifetime commitment."

"You could still-"

"It's Finn's child. I owe him the chance to raise it."

Raven scoffed, "You owe him, it's the right thing to do, blah blah blah. What about you and your happiness, Clarke?"

Clarke remained patient with her bestie. She had never divulged her true feelings for Lexa, and now was definitely not the time to do so. She didn't have the energy to explain why she was walking away from someone she was in love with. "I've gone this long without being totally happy, what's another twenty years. Besides, I'll have a baby to concentrate on. I'm sure I'll find my happiness there. I was thinking, I don't know, maybe we could go back to being friends. Lexa and I." Clarke had spent all day trying to convince herself that this was the best solution, the best for everyone involved. She was still very much on the fence though. "I think it could work."

"Are you fucking kidding?" Raven said incredulously. "You think after you had great sex, you're gonna turn off that attraction? Pfft! Good luck with that."

A tiny voice inside Clarke screamed in agreement. Good luck with that was right. The chances were miniscule that they could put this weekend behind them, act like it didn't happen, or act like they didn't want it to happen again. But a gal could hope.

"Yeah, Rae's right, might wanna wait on that friendship thing for a bit," O said. "You guys have a ton of chemistry. That just doesn't go away in a week."

"And is Finn gonna let you just be friends with Lexa?" Raven asked

"He will if he wants me back. I think he knows he's not in a position to make demands," Clarke said. "I can't not have her in my life. She's too important."