Lisa
Unable to control the grin on her face, Lisa admired the gorgeous little book worm, taking in the features of Jennie's profile and memorising every dimple and freckle that made Jennie - Jennie.
"You're staring," Jennie said with a grin, keeping her gaze down at her book.
"So are you," Lisa countered.
Lifting her gaze and turning in Lisa's direction, she laughed at her comment and closed her book around her finger. "Yes, but I'm staring at a book."
"So am I," Lisa lied.
"What, you're just admiring the cover art?"
"Exactly," Lisa confirmed.
Turning the book over in her hand, Jennie glanced at the cover that was solid red with absolutely no text or graphics, just plain red leather.
"Riveting." she sassed before opening the book again.
After a few more minutes had passed, Lisa shifted her weight again, trying to get comfortable, but failing miserably. She interlocked her fingers and rested them on her abdomen as she closed her eyes.
"You are uncomfortable," Jennie said, hearing the loud creaks from the wood beneath Lisa muscular body frame.
"I'm not here, remember," Lisa answered without moving or opening her eyes. Lifting one of her arms, she put a hand behind her head, using it as a makeshift pillow.
"Seriously, you don't look comfortable at all. You can use one of these cushions you know."
"Jen, would you mind being a little quieter, you're kind of ruining this for me," Lisa said unmoved with her eye still closed. An uncontrollable smile spread across Lisa's face when she opened one eye and peeked over only to see Jennie with her jaw slacked open at her statement. But even then, that tiny smile was still residing in the corner of her wide open mouth and Lisa was slowly becoming addicted to it, trying to find ways to make it spread across her face and up to her eyes. Silence filled the space between them before her angelic voice found its way to Lisa's ears.
"Poetry," Jennie said.
Lisa raised up onto her elbows at her words, thrilled that Jennie actually wanted to engage in conversation.
"What?"
"You asked what I was reading... it's a book of poetry... my mom's favourite book actually."
"Yeah?" Lisa desperately wanted to hear more and pulled herself back up to a seated position beside Jennie.
"I never really liked it when I was younger, but now... when I've had a really bad day and I wish I could talk to her, I just grab one of her books and I read." Jennie's words tugged at Lisa's heart strings in a way that she was extremely familiar with. Lisa was no stranger to loss and hated to see anyone fight that battle alone. Planting her hands down on the wooden floor, she scooted her body a few inches closer to Jennie, not touching her and leaving a small amount of space between them, but hoping to comfort her through proximity.
"I'm not a huge fan of poetry, but this was my mom's favourite book to read to me. Probably because it put me to sleep. It's just a book of classics - Dickinson, Whitman, Lord Byron..." Jennie's voice trailed off as if she were lost in thought. Her smile was so genuine, but her words were laced with so much pain, it took every ounce of Lisa's self-control not to scoop her up and hold her, but she knew better than that. In the short amount of time she had spent with Jennie, it was obvious that she needed to warm up to Lisa on her own time and she was well worth the wait.
"I never really could get on board with poetry either. I think it was all the rhyming. You know... one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish and all that."
Jennie's smile spread all the way across her face and up to her eyes, wrinkling her nose and causing Lisa's breath to catch in her throat.
"Did you just compare Emily Dickinson to Dr. Seuss?" Jennie's shoulders bounced with laughter as she pressed her lips into a line that curled up on both ends in an attempt to stifle it.
"Yeah I guess." Lisa confirmed, scratching the back of her head.
Tilting her head back as she laughed, Jennie brought her eyes back down to meet Lisa's and held them there, studying her as if she was trying to read Lisa like one of her books.
"Lisa, I don't know whether to hate you or to love you," Jennie said playfully.
"Well I can tell you which one I would prefer," Lisa chuckled. Her response caused another ripple of laughter to emerge from Jennie's sweet lips. Lisa loved the genuine happiness on her face and tried her best to take a mental picture of how relaxed and happy Jennie was in that moment.
There you are Jennie. Nice to finally meet you.
As her laughter subsided, one of her statements stuck out in Lisa's mind, one that she couldn't ignore and wanted to ask her about. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure," Jennie said with a smile.
"You said you would come up here to read after you've had a bad day. What was so bad about today?" Lisa asked with genuine curiosity, hoping that Jennie would confide in her, but was fully prepared for Jennie to shut down. She let out a sigh and repositioned herself, but this time she turned to face Lisa before curling herself back into her neat little ball with her knees pulled to her chest, which had to be a good sign.
"I'm just... tired." she admitted, resting her chin on her forearms.
Lisa cocked her head to the side, wanting Jennie to elaborate, because she knew there was more to it than being physically tired. Closing her eyes, Jennie sat there for a second or two as if she were trying to find the right words to describe how she felt and what was bothering her. She opened her eyes, having found the words she wanted to use, but her expression was pained and sad. It was a defeated look and Lisa absolutely hated it.
"The more time you spend with me Lisa, the more you are going to see that everyone wants something from me. Everyone has ulterior motives, all revolving around money and power, and I am so tired of having to decipher everyone's intentions. It's exhausting to not be able to trust anyone and even more exhausting to have everyone's eyes on me all the time." Jennie let out a sigh and folded further into herself, squeezing her legs tighter against her chest as she stared at the floor.
No wonder Jennie reacted the way she did today. Right now I'm just one more set of eyes on her and one more person that she can't trust.
Lisa wished like hell she could wrap her arms around Jennie, but restrained herself, trying to respect her need for space.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Jennie asked, bringing her gaze from the floor up to Lisa's eyes.
"No reason, I just think I understand you a little better now," she said genuinely.
Rewarding Lisa's with a half-smile, Jennie held Lisa's gaze, with her sleepy blinks getting slower and slower.
"You know you can trust me Jen." she soothed.
A sarcastic grin spread across her face at Lisa's words. "That still remains to be seen," Jennie said playfully.
I know you don't trust me now, but I'm gonna fight like hell to show you that you're safe with me. I'm gonna win you over Jennie Kim.
