she, conrad fisher

8

chapter 8
[play: this side of paradise by coyote theory]
if you're lonely, come be lonely with me

-

maisie (continuation of previous chapter)

the nap i had stupidly taken at 8 pm had done me no good because i was lying there wide awake next to belly with her clock reading 1 am. i was debating going back home, not that anything would really change, but i wouldn't have to worry about waking belly. i tossed and turned trying to get somewhat comfortable, but couldn't.

i could feel myself getting hungry and thought about going downstairs to grab a snack. deciding on at least letting belly sleep in peace, i quietly crept out of bed. belly was turned to her side, hands folded under her face, and small snores coming from her. i tiptoed across the floor, making my way over to the door. my heart raced as i prayed it wouldn't creak open and thankfully it didn't.

i made my way past steven then jeremiah then conrad's rooms. all the lights seemed to be off and it wad just silent. i was glad conrad had at least gone to bed instead of sitting out and smoking all night. reaching the kitchen, i kept the lights off since some of the backyard lighting from the pool, solar lights, and moon kept it lit enough for me to see. i opened the pantry door, the automatic light turning on and looked for some small snack.

i settled on goldfish and also grabbed a jar of peanut butter. in elementary school, i remember my best friend at the time eating her goldfish this way. because she was my best friend, i needed to try it and since have not been able to eat goldfish any other way. i loved the concept of learning things from others that you would adopt into your life and stick with no matter if the friendship was still there or not. it would always be a memory or tribute to that time. i wondered what it would be that i would learn from belly, jeremiah, steven, and even conrad to keep with me.

i took a spoon and scooped out some peanut butter into my plate, and then poured out a good amount of goldfish. putting everything back and then grabbing a glass of water, i stood by the big island and ate. it might of not been the most sustainable meal and i could have definitely gone for a left over hotdog, but this was hitting the spot.

i could hear steps come down the stairs and i wondered if i had been too loud or done something to wake up someone. my stomach turned, ready to be yelled at as i waited to see who would approach the kitchen. a tall figure switched on one of the low lights, revealing himself to be conrad. he looked wide awake just like me as if he hadn't slept one bit after i had left him. i mean i was no different.

"what are you doing?" conrad asked, leaning against the wall.

"eating a snack." i told him, giving him an awkward smile.

"are those goldfish and-" he paused trying to make-out what else was on my plate. "peanut butter?"

"i was hungry." i shrugged, continuing to scoop peanut butter onto the goldfish before popping it in my mouth.

"no way that actually tastes good." he sounded shocked and in disbelief, when i truly didn't think it was that bad.

"is this your way of asking if you can try some?" i tilted my head at him.

"no." he trailed off. "im not eating that." he laughed.

conrad was dressed in some old high school chess club t shirt and plaid shorts. his hair was a little messy. as he got closer, i could see that there was sleep in his eyes. he just seemed to be fighting it for some reason. conrad moved past me and made his way over to the fridge, where he pulled out a pack of sliced cheese. he grabbed the bread and turned towards the stove, heating up the pan to make himself a grilled cheese.