This is all we've got

Chapter seven: the bad side of the coin

Sixteen should have known, really. The writer never did anything that didn't have intention. Well, most of the time. Most of the time, the writer didn't do things without an intention.

If she and Kyung had been left to their devices for such a long time, then that merely meant that someone else was unlucky enough to have the writer's attention. Sixteen almost regretted it. Almost.

"Eun Danoh's dying," Haru said faintly, eyes lost seeing something that Sixteen couldn't.

He had come to her with his big eyes painfully sad and Sixteen had immediately let go of any grudge she had thought she was holding and followed him outside to a bench near the student garden where Juda was watering some flowers. In that moment she had decided she didn't care about before because Danoh was clearly someone Haru cared about a lot. And sitting here, his words echoing in her head, she found she honestly didn't care anymore. Named or not, he was her first ever friend.

Now all she could do was listen with a sinking feeling as her friend said more words to her than he ever had before, his eyes communicating far more to her than any of his words.

Pain. Sadness. Helplessness. Frustration.

"I think the writer is trying to kill her. Because of her meddling."

I don't know what to do.

"Every time I think I can save her it doesn't work and she ends up crumpled on the floor in pain or back in the hospital."

Haru hunched over and put his head in his hands, fingers rubbing restlessly at his forehead.

Gently, Sixteen reached over and rested a hand on his shoulder. She didn't move it, merely left it there as a weight, hopefully grounding him and reminding him of her presence. That he wasn't alone.

"Is she still...?"

"She still won't listen. She's determined and... it hurts me, sometimes."

Sixteen didn't think much of it, thinking he was talking about his emotions until he lifted his head and gestured to his left hand, the one with the scar.

"It burns, just like new, sometimes when she tries to change the story. I-It's strange, though, it's not just my hand when that happens. It's my heart, too, it aches and for a short time I... I feel so sad I might die."

Sixteen narrowed her eyes as she looked down at his open palm, his scar angrily red and irritated.

"Have you told her? That it hurts you?"

Haru didn't say anything for a moment. "No."

"Thirteen. She needs to know what she's putting you through. If she won't stop for herself, then surely she cares enough about you... to stop for you."

Again, Haru didn't say anything straight away, nor did he react to the slip of his name.

"That's what I'm worried about. That if I tell her, she will give up."

Sixteen stared at him uncomprehendingly. "And why is that such a bad thing? If she gives up and stops trying to mess with the story, it will make life a whole lot easier for everyone. Including herself."

But Haru was shaking his head. "I can't be the reason she gives up on saving herself. Her setup- she's trying to stop herself from dying. Do you know what her one wish is? It's to live. It's something so simple and yet because of her setup, it means so much to her."

"Haru, you don't really think the writer would kill her character off in a story like this, do you? It's a clichéd romance. She and Kyung... Eun Danoh and Baek Kyung are clearly destined to end up together. A story like that wouldn't make sense if she was killed off suddenly."

Haru didn't look convinced at all.

"I know that provoking the writer doesn't exactly help her case," he said slowly. "But even if she doesn't do anything, is there really a hundred percent chance she won't die?" He took a deep breath, his eyes shutting briefly. "If you had read the manhwa, you'd know that her situation is not good. Is she just supposed to suffer through countless surgeries and painful incidents in the hope that she'll make it to the writer's ending and be declared permanently healthy?"

Sixteen's mouth moved uselessly, unable to find words. Haru met her gaze steadily, sad yet firm.

"Okay, sure," she conceded. "But what do you honestly think you can do? The writer can literally do whatever they want. We're in their story. Main characters get the ending they want. Supporting characters help them get it, and extras just exist." She exhaled resignedly. "We enter the scene and exit as the writer pleases, and when the day is done, the story will end when they want it to, how they want it to. What does meddling achieve exactly other than only further endangering the existence of her character?"

"What do you think the writer would do to a character who acts out?" Haru asked, not even angry at her, just sad and scared and lost. What will happen to Danoh?

She took a moment to think over it properly, her mouth twisted thoughtfully. "Hypothetically, a character like that wouldn't be left to act as they want for long. Either they'd be removed from the story entirely, or the writer would make sure they couldn't act out anymore. I don't... I don't know what that would mean exactly."

Sixteen looked up when she became aware of a movement out the corner of her eye and noticed Juda walking away from the garden and towards the school building. Maybe a scene was about to start.

Checking the time on her watch, she realised it was nearly class time which meant there was a high chance there would be a class scene and so they didn't have much time left.

Haru was still looking at her, deep in thought, when she returned her attention to him. At least he was listening to her although his mood hadn't improved, and he somehow looked even more conflicted.

"Look, I don't know anything for sure," she said, sighing. "All I know is that I don't want you to get hurt more if you don't have to. But I don't suppose me saying that would stop you from throwing yourself in harm's way for her sake. So do what feels right. If you and Danoh are working together on this, then you need to tell her everything so that you can save her together. You can't be keeping secrets from each other."

"But-"

"Stop it, I'm right. I don't know her very well but I'm almost certain she'd hit you if she knew you were keeping this from her. And one last thing."

Sixteen smiled sadly and pulled him into a hug because goodness knows he looked like he needed one.

"It's 50/50, you know," she said into his shoulder. "50: she dies. 50: she lives. The odds may seem hopeless and horrible but it's the same for everyone. Either way, no matter what you do, it's 50/50. Don't get lost in your head, okay? Nothing's over yet. 50/50. Got it?"

"50/50," she heard him echo as he clutched onto her tightly and that was the last thing she heard before that cursed turning page was ringing in her ears and then she was in class.

Amidst the scene, Sixteen noticed that Eun Danoh's seat in the middle of the room was empty. She was probably in the hospital, her character bedridden. She did feel somewhat sorry towards the girl for the setup she was stuck with, but she was hardly the only one with a bad setup. Haru probably wouldn't like that particular opinion if she ever voiced it. But from Sixteen's point of view, as characters in a manhwa, they had no choice but to accept the fate they were given.

When she was able to, Sixteen looked over her shoulder to the back of the room but Kyung wasn't there. She frowned. If Danoh was in the hospital, then the likelihood of Kyung being with her was high considering his setup. They really were fated to be together.

Sixteen looked back to where Haru was staring out the window by his desk. She wondered where that left Haru. She knew he cared for Danoh. Maybe too much.