Wanted nail Senpai

First hit

In my quest to find my toolmate on Wattpad, I came across someone charming and nailing every qualities that I search in a partner.

It all happened on an evening of August 2022, I took the liberty to go on a stranger's account's wall and ask if anyone knew a nail on this reading platform. I was getting desperate after a few seconds without any signs of punchables nails anywhere so I shamelessly acted upon it. I thought that I had screwed everything up with that move. I had a cold sweat while anxiously waiting for an answer from anyone on Wattpad. After some tense seconds, I heard a "ping" noise from my cellphone. My hammer head made a 0° degrees turn when hearing that sound as I don't possess a neck but just a body made of one thick wooden stick. I opened my phone and saw something unexpected on the lock-screen. It was a notification I had received from Wattpad. After entering my password and going on the Wattpad application, I scrolled through my non-existent notification feed until the message I had not really waited for. My hammer heart was hammering against my woody thin ribcage as I read the poetic words from my not-yet nailmate. I read them several times not believing what I just read:

Maybeyourangel was directly hitting on me !! My first attempt at seeking a companion was really nailing it. I was eager to know more about them to see if it was a road worth constructing together so I started my private investigation.

My first impression of this charming nail was that they were quite direct, asking to be a candidate as my nail senpai on the first interaction we had. They seemed expressive due to the presence of a kaomoji at the end of their sentence, so in other words, emotionally open. Their grammar was on point and they were polite too. They came across as a nice and decent nail.

So I undertook to tag them on the comment section of the chapter of this book with my dating ad. I went back to sleep as despite the time my VPN was showing, it was way past midnight so I went back to sleep. I really was hammered.
The next morning, at breakfast, I saw that they replied to the tag and it was the best surprise ever. I wished to wake up like that every morning with a cute message from a special someone.

They seemed to be an attentive partner as well by showing interest in my hobbies, in this case punching stuff.
Also, someone good at getting punched ??? This was only getting better and better. Who wouldn't want to ever punch someone good at receiving the punches ? I mean, the whole thing is very satisfying even just the sound "Bonk!" that results of it. I could go on for hours about how nice punching is.

This was like going at Home Depot at this point. They seemed so cute, the ideal nail senpai.

They even talked about me with their friends. I was so drilled by all this positive attention.

Everything was going so well, I really was on cloud nine. I was already imagining to present them to Mr. Planck and what sort of date we would build together or going on dating websites for tips to handle nails correctly as a true gentlehammer.

BUT IT WAS ALL TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE.

I discovered that same week that... Maybeyourangel is married to soft-doctor-oml and I do not want to be part of an affair. I wouldn't want to screw the sweet relationship you both have as you also both seem very sweet people.

So, Maybeyourangel ... Sorry to announce that I am not the hammer of your building site. You are an amazing nail but I only punch one nail at a time... So, please don't resent me but I will have to reject your offer. I was really flattered that a nail such as you would even look in my direction but it would rust my head to get in between you and your wife-husband. I hope you both only the best and to construct as many IKEA kits as possible.

soft-doctor-oml sorry for having tried to court your partner. I wasn't aware of that, no hard feelings I hope. You seem hammeringly cool !!

★゜*。。*゜☆゜*。。*゜★゜*。。*゜☆

Here are some constructive criticisms of my dating ad that I received following my request to qualified people on the subject:

I will then have to write a longer dating ad in the future with more details to avoid any future misunderstandings or awkward situations like the one with Maybeyourangel. However, my grammar is on point and this book is okay ( ꈍᴗꈍ)
Both these reviewer are very cool for taking the time to read my modest partner research book.

I will have to try harder to find my nail senpai !
If I am lucky enough, my next update will be to announce my official dating status like on Fakebook. (人*'∀｀)｡*ﾟ+

17/08/2022