26 | Lost Forever

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Letting go is never easy

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Letting go is never easy. You leave behind a part of yourself to move on.

It was his last working day at the Brew Story Café. It was a place that had been part of his routine for the three precious years of his life. Now, as he handed out the last of the orders, his eyes scanned the interior one last time, taking in as many details as he could remember. Then his eyes stopped at the red vinyl booth at the far end corner.

A smile stretched across his lips as an image of Enzo perched on the same booth flashed in his mind. It was a bittersweet memory, and Kian would be lying if he said it didn't hurt to recall all the moments he shared with Enzo.

It had been a month since Enzo stopped sending him voice messages or random texts claiming how much he missed Kian. One month, since Kian stopped re-reading his old texts and replaying his old voice messages every single night. One month since he broke up with his boyfriend over unanswered calls and silent denial.

The ache was still fresh in his heart, but the fact that their relationship was doomed to fall prey to the hands of time and distance somehow dulled it a little.

And maybe he was angry back then, but now he just regretted acting out the way that he did. He regretted not giving Enzo a chance to explain himself. He cut the boy out as if he wasn't the only one for him.

Yes, Enzo was his forever, and he had known that since they first kissed. No one could take his place in Kian's heart.

His eyes flickered towards the farewell banner on the wall behind the counter with purple-colored paper flowers around his name. Earlier that evening, Simone and the staff threw him a dreamy farewell party with his favorite confectionaries and expensive champagne. It was nothing less than a heart-warming experience for him to see Simone's sad smile as he said his goodbye.

"You know that Brew Story will always be your second home. If you ever want to leave the corporate world and decide to be a barista again." Simone had said as he gave him a tight friendly hug.

"I Know, Simone." Kian had to press in a smile even though all he wanted was to cry about how much he would miss the place and the little family it gave him.

Kian took off his apron, smoothed his hand down his crisp white shirt, and realized he was alone in the café. He tossed the keys in the air and caught them in time with a dramatic show of finally handing them over to Simone. When the door jingled, his eyes jumped to be rewarded with the image of a familiar customer strolling in. Tonight he was wearing a black hoodie and simple black jeans, his hair arranged in a low bun and his midnight irises as dark as Kian had learned them to be whenever they collided with his eyes.

It felt like a dream to him.

Was it a dream? Was he seeing things now?

Then something familiar spiked through the air around him and thundered in his skull to his awareness. It was subtle at first, a combination of scents, his cologne, the aftershave, his sweat, and then he stood in front of him, just a few steps separating them, and it created a series of sensations across Kian's skin. His spine pushed against the counter as the familiar feeling rushed through his veins. God, he missed him.

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