Flying Solo

Chapter 16

6 months. That had crept up quickly on Jordan. Faith was sitting up and over the last week had cut her first tooth. What an experience that had been. Between the constant crying, the fevers and the spit, Jordan was hoping the rest would be slighlty easier.

Relief had come when Jordans mother had offered to take her for the night to give her a much needed break. She had managed to stay on top of house work and cleaning but all of that came at the cost of sleep. Sleep was definitely understated and something you dont realise how much you need until you cant have as much as you need. Thats when everything goes to shit.

Her night of freedom consited of a long hot soak in the bath, face masks, and of course, wrapping christmas presents.

It was their first christmas as a family and because this Jordan had gone a little overboard with decorations and presents. Silver and gold sparkly wrapping paaper took over most of the living room floor under and around the tree but to Jordan, it was perfect.

Her first night without Faith was amazing but a small part of her felt guilty for feeling this way. Every rational cell in Jordans body told her that it was normal but the samll niggling voice of incompetence won out a few times which then made her ring her mum who promptly ignored her. She did however, send her a text saying everything was good and she should rest up.

Christmas came around quickly and the morning was spent it under the mountain of wrapping paper which  Faith had found it most entertaining to rip into shreds and throw around the room.

The twinkly lights had kept her amazed and enthraled whilst Jordan cleared away the mess. SHe had tried earlier but the cheeky girl had decided to make a fuss at the lack of sparkly things and so setting the lights to twinkly and leaving her for a few minutes was easiest solution.

Christmas afternoon was spent at her mothers house surrounded by more glitter, lights and strewn about paper. All the focus was on her beautiful baby girl and Jordan took the moment to really appreciate how lucky she was.

It wasnt until she had a presented thrusted at her that Jordan realised she had begun to daydream about anything and everything.

“Open this. Its from me and your dad.” Her mother insisted and stood there watching whilst a dumbfounded Jordan fumbled to open the present.

It was beautiful. A small heart shaped pendant with Faiths name and date of birth on. In the centre of the box was a child size bracelet that matched the design of the necklace. Jordan was overwhelmed with emotion; she choked out a small thank you and hugged her mum.

When she looked over, her dad was playing with Faith on the floor. Jordan mouthed a thank you to him to which he just gave her a small smile and resumed his task from before.

Christmas dinner was the best meal Jordan had had since she moved out so many months ago. It wasnt because she hadnt cooked but more so the fact she wasnt eating food she had cooked herself. She missed her mums cooking and asked if she could box up leftover to take home.

Faith was given her own version of dinner which consisted of carrot sticks being mushed into nothing on her high chair tray. A quarter of a yorkshire pudding which she actually ate and the sprouts that she had gargled nonesense about before throwing them on the floor thinking it was the best game in the whole world.

Allowing Faith to explore food in her own way was a feat and Jordan loved it. She loved the mess and the pure unadulterated joy on Faiths face when spaghetti went flying and stuck to the wall or when the mashed potatoes splatted onto her mums face.

These were all moments she would cherish for a lifetime but knew that all too  soon, all they would be is memories of her first christmas. Successful as it may be, it was still an exhausting day.

Boxing day was a whirlwind of vistors and presents and cheer and by the time the new year came around both Jordan and Faith were thoroughly exhausted and their bellys fit to explode. They spent the new year curled up together on the sofa watching the second Harry Potter film which was completely over Faiths little brain capacity but the effects amazed her nonetheless.

“I love you princess, happy new year.” Jordan whispered into the sleeping infants ear before putting her down gently into her cot.