Goat Love - Messi x Ronaldo

Allez PSG Ole PSG

Ronaldo POV -

Me and Dave decided to hide out at Ole's house as no one would bother to look for us there.

Knock knock knock

"Oh, Hello Ronny and Davey! Been a while hasn't it! Oh bless... do come in! I've been baking some cupcakes so you can come in and try some if you want to!"

He took us into his living room and switched on Sky Sports where it showed the aftermath of what happened at Old Trafford.

"Ooh, mess of a club that, isn't it? Oh boy, well, anyway, those cupcakes must be done by now. Mind, I know you won't want any Ronny, but that's ok as I've got some healthier options in my cupboards, ok? Sit here Davey and I'll go get them for you right now buddy!" Ole walked out of the room to his kitchen.

"We didn't even tell him anything... why's he just let us in here?" I asked.

"He's just a nice bloke really isn't he."

"Yeah."

Suddenly, the TV got interrupted by a message from the French government, well, the new french government. Now ran by the house of Lottin.

Kylian Mbappe was sat on a throne in a castle, he said something along the lines of this:

"Cristiano Ronaldo dos Santos Aveiro, this is a message for you, my idol. I know you're listening, come with me, to Paris Saint-Germain, and together we will RULE Europe!"

I always knew that kid worshipped me, but I couldn't believe my luck. I remember last time Mbappe didn't want me overshadowing him because of Neymar and Messi but since then Neymar got executed and Messi went missing... nothing new really.. I'm joking, of course, I was devastated when I found out my love Messi went messing.

Anyway, I figured that this was a win-win situation as my lover Messi couldn't of strayed too far away from Paris so I could go and look for him there and express my feelings and I'll be finally out of this shithole known as Manchester United football club.

"Pack your bags Dave, we're going to Paris!" I shouted.

Ole rushed back into the room. "Paris? Oh I love that city, Ronny! Oh what fabulous nights they were... what gave me the United job permanently... and then what saved me from getting the sack... oh, I love Paris."

I figured that Ole is the type of guy that just never says no so I decided to ask him something.

"Ole, can you take us to the airport?" I asked.

"Sure thing my boy, Ronny!" He responded. "I'll be waiting in the car, you can take as long as you need!"

I decided to just follow Ole into the car, I wanted to get out of Manchester as quick as possible, Dave snagged a few cupcakes before running after us.

"Alright boys, make sure you buckle your seatbelts!" We set off.

"I'm going to miss this place.." Dave whimpered from the back of the car.

"Why? The weather is shit and so is the football club." I responded. "Well, City are good but not the Manchester club we play for."

"I've made so many friends here... well they've all left since then but the memories...."

"Dave." I said "We're going from Manchester to PARIS. Ok?"

"I guess you're right, it's an upgrade... probably."

I decided not to respond, I was more concerned on how Ole didn't seem to care about what we were saying, he was still mumbling about Paris, for some reason.

"Oh and you know, Ronny, Rashy won it for us TWICE! What a guy he is!... was... he's not that good now is he, I've heard." He said. "Do you remember those nights in Paris, Davey?"

"Yeah mate, it was good."

"Alright, which one was better? 2019 or 2020? I'd have to say 2019, what a night it was Davey! Neymar was starstruck! May he rest in peace, I must say... didn't mean to cause any offence to the dead there, you know."

"Yeah."

Oles a nice guy, but Jesus, does he go on. We had more of this rambling for the rest of the car ride but I decided just to deal with it as long as it meant I was getting out of Manchester."

"Thanks, Ole." Dave said.

"No problem, Davey and Ronny! It's my pleasure, really!" He drove off.

"We haven't booked a flight, how do we get on any flights?" Dave asked.

"Oh I'm Ronaldo I'll give them a million quid or something." I responded.

We noticed a flight to Paris with easyJet at 5PM, it was closing in on 5PM so we legged it to the gate and I threw a few grand at the airport fella and he just let us in.

"I'm going to be treated like a king there!" I was so excited."

"Bye, Manchester." Dave sighed.