I walk back to the closest nurses tent, hoping to find someone to help me figure out where to go. "Excuse me?" I ask walking into the tent. The beds are overflowing with wounded soldiers, and even a few who aren't. No one heard me or if they did, I was ignored. "Can someone help me?" I say louder.
That gets the attention of one of the young nurses. "Who are you?"
"I'm Cece. I was working on the medic ship that went down, and then on the destroyer last night." Her eyes widen and her disposition changes immediately. I can see the pity written all over her face.
"Oh, darling, that's awful. I'm Betty, come over here and we'll try to get you all situated somewhere." She leads me to a wooden bench they just moved a soldier off of. "Rest here, I'll come for you in a few hours, and maybe we can put you to work."
"Thank you," I say. I lay down on the hard wood, and try to get more sleep than I did on the beach. I wake up to someone gently shaking my shoulders.
"Up ya get, hon." It's an older lady, with her hair piled on top of her head. "We just got more men in, halfway frozen with frostbite on the beach. Those sea waves are taking a toll on our men." Men, the beach, my boys. I get up and scan the faces, but they all look unfamiliar.
The men are taken care of quickly, and I'm left to boil pots and pots of water to heat them up quicker. I've seen more than enough of my share of black and shriveled limbs.
More men come, and none of them are mine. My throat constricts even more than it had before. I rush over to Betty. "I'm sorry to do this, but I left my friends out there, and I'm worried about them." She pauses from her work. "I have to go make sure that they are all okay."
"Don't worry, dear, I'll make sure that everything here goes smoothly."
"Thank you," I exclaim before running out of the tent and down the beach.
"No!" I scream. I've definitely gone too far, and there was no sign of any of the boys. I sink to my knees, dread filling me. I can't imagine where they could have gone, they said they were going to wait for another boat. Maybe they went to find revisions. Even with that in the back of my mind, I cannot help thinking of the worst.
A sob racks through me as I can't help but picture them all dead at the hands of the Germans. I missed my chance to stay with them, die with them. I have never felt so much regret in all my days. I sit there crying and sniffling, until I hear footsteps. For a second I'm scared, until I realize it doesn't matter. I'm not welcome home after the war is over, since I left to help. My boys are gone, probably dead in a trench.
I don't even look up as the footsteps get closer until I hear, "Oh my gosh, Cece?" My head flies up and finds Alex standing in front of me. My heart soars, but I still am scared for Tommy.
I jump to my feet and run to him. Alex lifts me off the ground and spins me in a circle. I wrap my arms around him, and just take in the fact that I'm no longer alone on the cold beach. "Where- where are the others?" My heart catches in my throat, waiting for Alex's response.
"In that boat down there." He points to the small dot way down the beach. He must have seen the look on my face because he says, "Don't worry, Tommy's not hurt."
"What are you doing out here?"
"Looking for you actually. Tommy's a mess without you. He's just sitting in the corner whispering to himself and crying I think."
"Oh. Well I left the nursing tent because they were pulling a lot of the men in for frostbite, and I got worried about you being in the cold."
"Let's get you out of it and back with Tommy." The walk back was enjoyable with my light heart, knowing I'll get to see my boy soon.
I struggle climbing the stairs with my numb feet, but Alex helps me. All eyes turn to me when I open the hatch, except for one. "He brought back a bloody girl," one of the soldiers mutters. Tommy glances up at those words, and at once I'm in his arms.
Tommy buries his face into my hair and I can feel him instantly relax. My hands go straight to his hair, running through it and just holding him close. All too soon he lets go and grabs my hand. We go back to the corner he had been in, followed by Alex.
"You came back?" Tommy asks when we get settled. Since the boat is so crowded and cold, he insisted I sit as close as possible, so I find myself nestled between his legs.
"Yes," I say. "I tried to stay, but I couldn't focus knowing my boys might not be safe. I couldn't bear the thought of not knowing what happened to you."
"Those twelve hours were a nightmare." Tommy pulls me closer to him. "I knew you were safe, but I wasn't. Couldn't imagine not being able to see you again."
Alex interjects and says, "Did you just call us your boys?" I laugh and nod.
"I did. I can't help thinking of you that way. You wouldn't understand, that in the past two days I've known you, you've become like my family." Tommy and Alex look at each other then back at me. "What?" I ask.
"We had been talking about you, right after you left this morning," Alex says. "I told Tommy how you said I was like your brother and we had wondered what your family is like, for you to make such a connection so quickly with someone you barely knew?"
I sigh and relax more into Tommy's chest. "My father enlisted right when the war started, determined that the war wouldn't last long." My voice catches in my throat. "Two months later we received the letter. My father had been shot during combat and died of infection six days later."
"Oh, Cece, I'm sorry," Alex tells me. I give him a smile of thanks before I continue my story.
"I had enough of sitting around my house without being helpful, so I enlisted as a nurse. When I told my mother, she said I was no child of her's if I was going to desert her at this time. When I told her I didn't have a choice anymore, she said I wouldn't be welcome back after the war is over." I fight off the memories of heartbreak and loneliness as Tommy holds me close.
"Love," Tommy begins.
"Don't worry about it because I have you now, if only for a little bit." I can see the unspoken words that are passed between him and Alex. The pity they feel for me is almost tangible. I do little to fight it though, because the memories feel less strong when I'm with them.
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