Phantom Regret

Chapter Five: Hatred

Jennie

"If you need me, I will be in the kitchen preparing dinner". I tried to walk away, but her voice stops me once again.

"Since when, Jennie?".

"Lisa, we don't have to do this right now". I coldly spoke.

"Is that the reason you left?". Another attempt at guilt-tripping me.

She wasn't trying to make me feel bad or guilty, but my fucked up brain will think so. It will assume the worst just to push her away.

"Are you trying to make me feel guilty? Because if so, know damn well that it's not working". I crossed my arms.

"Passive.. always passive aggressive whenever someone touches your walls". Lisa walked closer to me, "You know that I'm not trying to make you guilty, but rather trying to know why you left without any given reason".

Her eyes dared mine, "To find a hint of the truth".

"After two fucking years? Too late". I numbly answered.

"It's never too late". Lisa remained persistent, pushing further until my soul crumbled against the way she towered over me with her height.

We were only inches away from each other.. eyes on each other, lips so close.. But I pulled away as soon as Woobin opened the door. "Is Lisa enjoying her stay?".

"I guess so". I backed away without breaking the eye contact.

Guessing is the game here, Lisa.

You will guess my reasons, but I will run away with excuses, and avoid telling you the reasons.

-

Lisa

For so long, I've always imagined the beautiful scenery of her laying in bed, waiting for me. I imagined the faithful, patient girl who also held the title of 'The Girl Of My Dreams'. I felt the smoke enter my lungs and leave as soon as I started thinking about her. But, she lives in my mind rent-free. She's always there, in the back of it, holding me back from flying and from wanting to run away and find someone else.

Jennie held the ropes of my heart in a tight grip and simply kissed someone else.

Someone who isn't me.

I shrugged the thoughts away. Why would jealousy control me?

Why would I be possessive over what's not mine?

-

Dazzled, I enter the kitchen and watch Jennie cook. Her boyfriend sat in the living room, watching TV. Seriously, who watches TV nowadays? I bit my lip and slowly tip-toed my way to her. Gently, I placed my hand on her hip and watched her suck a deep breath with her back to me, as I glued our bodies together.

"Lisa". She warningly said my name.

"Friend? We were friends, Jennie?".

"Whatever we were, he doesn't have to know". She tried to brush the topic off, grabbed a plate, and I placed my hand gently on her waist and breathed in her scent. My breath tickled her neck as I whispered, "Why are you scared of letting him know?".

Jennie breathed in heavily and tried to get away but she was trapped between me and the kitchen island, with her back pressed to my front.

My hand moved to rest on her stomach, as it trailed under her shirt. Her white shirt. Goosebumps rose on her skin. "Lisa.. y-you.. let me go". Senseless attempts to get me away from her.

"If I wanted to, I would've done that in the start". I grinned to myself. "I have no plans in leaving space between us, Jennie".

My hand moved to her breast.. and to my surprise, she was wearing nothing beneath. My heart pace quickened as I licked my lips and placed my hand there. Jennie whimpered but didn't make any attempt at pushing me away.

"Friends? You say we're friends yet here you are, addicted to my touch. And we both know how easily I turn you on.. how you're mine, and without having the chance to prove it, it's already proven".

"I fucking hate you".