Dear diary,
One time in class today i had to take a big diarrhoea doo doo but miss Sugma didn't let me go so i said "welcome to diarrhoea town!!" and pulled down my pants and shat in her face, I thought it was funny but I had to go to the head teachers office, after that he sent me home.
although I haven't made any friends down in ligaunda yet, there is this one boy Gargamel, he is really cute, and has a bald spot on his head that I just want to caress it with my love. He lives across the street from me though.
Bye diary XOXO Y/N
I sigh as I roll over on my back hugging my diary, I was craving onions.
I went to the kitchen and stepped on a few rats on the way down, they all squeaked but none of them died
I picked up the best looking onion and ate it
*moan *moan *moan
(you're moaning cause it tastes good)
Suddenly there was a knock on my door, I walked over too the door and open the to see the one and only Gargamel <33
"Uhm I made you onion stew, well my mum made it but she told me to give it to you" he said
shoving a pot in my hands
"Thanks, I really love onions" I replied "do you wanna come in, its cold outside?" I asked
"mm yeas, I shat my pants walking across the street, can I use your toilet?" He asked
"Yeah ofc" I said
I picked up the toilet off the dinning table and put it under his ass, he then shat in the toilet, a sudden change of wind happened and now he had explosive diarrhoea, the toilet busted out of my hands pushing me against the wall and now I had his shit all over my walls and body.
He stoped shitting and helped me up because I fell down
what a gentlemen
"sorry I didn't mea-"
I cut him off my smashing my lips onto his,
"Don't worry, its ok, I love you Garg"
"I love you too Y/N"
then had an onion fight, he won cause I gave up.
Now I know that love is real
THE END
