𝐤𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐚.

𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧' 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭

omniscient
katana stared at herself in brit's bathroom mirror, she noticed every little flaw and imperfection. it had last been 2 days since she sent jah that message, 2 days since her relapse, and 2 days since anyone had heard anything from her again

brit hadn't been home but had given katana the keys to her place while she was away visiting family in california and told kat stay as long as she needed. so kat did, she was staying as long as she needed

her phone had been blowing up nonstop for the past 2 weeks but especially after her conversation with jah. it had seemed as if there was a search party out there now looking for her

she stared at herself until her eyes began to unfocus, and the walls started spinning. she felt her balance shift and her grip on the counter loosen as she dropped to the floor unconscious

little did she know that her actions were soon about to catch up her when she woke up as x, ski, and coolie all had caught a flight out there yesterday and ellie had managed to track tana's location even with though she had stopped sharing it

she had located it to brit's apartment and luckily enough she had a spare key so they all went. when they got there, ellie didn't hesitate to start banging on the door and shouting kats name, when she realized kat wasn't gonna willingly come out, she unlocked the door and opened it before they all walked in

brittney's apartment was a 3 bd, 2 bath so they all took a room and went looking. little did they know the horror they were about to see

estella opened brit's bathroom and her eyes instantly went to the floor where she saw kat laying there unconscious. her eyes welled up with tears as she started shouting for everyone to come, she kneeled down next to her and started shaking her as ski called 911. they came and transported her to the hospital

a couple hours had gone by and now katana was finally awake, she sat up and looked around and saw jahseh sitting next to her with his eyes closed. she then looked around and noticed where she was

she laid back down "fuck" she said and jah opened his eyes, he looked over at her and she sighed "how the actual fuck i end up in the hospital, i was literally alone" she mumbled and jah rolled his eyes "katana, you're really fucking slow you know that?" he said to her and she looked over at him

"jah i-" she started before he cut her off "nah, you don't need to say shit right now. nothing can justify this shit, at all mama. nothing can justify me sitting up in the hospital after the women i love goes unconscious because she hasn't been taking any type of care of herself and decided going m.i.a from the people who love her was going to make shit better" he said and she bit her lip and looked up at him with puppy dog eyes

he shook his head at her "them eyes not bouta work on me right now, not in this situation" he told her and she sighed "look i don't know what you want me to tell you" she said and now he was the one sighing

"i want you to tell me you won't do this shit again, that when something's wrong you'll come to me or ell, or stell but just don't do this again" he replied and she shrugged "okay" she mumbled out knowing she was lying to him

he knew she was too "katana, i'm dead fucking serious too. if this shit happens again, imma tear yo ass up" he told her and she nodded before sinking back into the hospital bed as jahseh went and got her best friends

ell and stell came in and started asking katana questions as she unfocused her eyes again and felt herself getting lightheaded and jah noticed this and started calling for the doctor before she went unconscious again

this time she was only out for 30 minutes, when she woke up she saw jah talking to her doctor and stell was holding her hand

stell noticed she was awake "kat? why'd you do this? why can't you just ever come to us? what's the point of us all being best friends if you never come to us when things happened?" she asked katana softly and kat bit her lip out and shrugged

ell put her head on stell's shoulder "the communication from you has to get better baby, we love you so much and the fact that we never know when things are going on scares the shit outta us. all three of us know how you are once you're alone with yourself, and yet you never come to us when you know it's getting bad. do you not trust us?" ellie questioned and tana sighed

"i do trust y'all, i just don't want to burden y'all. you two are so happy right now, y'all in love, bouta move and go start the lives you always wanted. i don't wanna intrude on that" she replied softly as the doctor started speaking to katana

she was saying how she considered inpatient for katana but decided not to as it wouldn't help in her situation, she recommended therapy for her and a change of scenery 

"and this is for you specifically katana, congratulations you're 4 weeks pregnant" the doctor told her and her eyes went wide

"I'm sorry, i'm what? no no, that can't be right like at all" she choked out and the doctor shook her head "no it is right, i took a ultrasound on you to make sure your insides weren't damaged and saw the cells being formed for a baby" the doctor replied and katana shook her head

"there's no fucking way bro" she said as her voice cracked and she started of crying but definitely not tears of joy. ell and stell looked at jah and he was just as shocked as she was

the doctor excused herself and ell and stell got up "we'll give y'all a minute" ell said as the two walked out, closing the door behind them

"so..you're pregnant mama" he said and she nodded as she sobbed harder. he went over to her and hugged her "hey it's okay, we gon figure this out together mi amore. i love you ok?" he said

"j-jah, i-i d-don't w-want k-kids" she choked out in between sobs and he nodded understanding that "i know princess, and if you want an abortion i'll take you to get one. just know i'm gonna be here, this is my responsibility too as it is my fault you're pregnant" he told her and she nodded

"is that what you wanna do? get an abortion?" he asked and she nodded "y-yea" she replied and he nodded

while that's definitely not what he wanted, he knew this wasn't about him. he knew katana wasn't stable in the slightest and where they were right now just helped further his point on that. however of course he wanted a baby with her, he loved her. he had so much love for her and everything about her, plus he's always wanted to be a dad. so yea, he wanted to her to want to keep it but he understands all the reasons she didn't want to

so he would support her in her choice because of how much he loves her

(a/n: hey upper east siders, since i put y'all through hell with the ending of the last chapter, you know i had to double it 🤭. anyways it might be a minute before another chapter comes out, or not. who knows, we all know i have a shit upload schedule. but yea, no babies for katana me thinks at least not yet. possibly in the future? who knows. - xoxo, gossip girl)