M State Beach Day

Beach Day

Author's Note: Two important things. 1. Chubby Michigan. 2. If you don't know what Rocky Mountain Oysters are, I suggest you Google it. 

"Oh no [speaks Boston] way am I wearing that." Massachusetts crossed his arms. He refused to even touch the heinous shirt that Maryland held out to him. It was several sizes too big, they all were, and the design. God, the design was the worst part. On the front there were cliparts of rivers, lakes, coastlines, and a bear. Just set wherever on the shirt. The beach design was upside down! And the Ms. Oh boy. Eight Ms on the back, all of different colors, size, and font.

Maryland shoved the shirt at Massachusetts again. "It wasn't a question, hon. Everybody else is wearing the shirt. So you will too."

"It's [speaks Boston] ugly. No."

"It's. Not. A. Negotiation"

Massachusetts flipped Maryland off. He turned his back to the nuisance. He still needed to finish packing his bag for the beach trip. Airpods for the car ride. An extra set of clothes, in case his get dirty. Sunglasses. Sunscreen. His Dunk- OOF.

He only really saw a flash of yellow from Maryland's Old Bay swimsuit as he was tackled to the ground. The giant shirt being shoved over his head. Massachusetts waved his arms about frantically, trying to hit the shirt or Maryland or something. But he was having no luck. Maryland's eyes weren't covered by a giant ridiculous cloth. So he was able to grab Massachusetts's arms and force them into the holes of the shirt.

"We're. Gonna. Match." Maryland panted as he wrestled with Massachusetts. "And. You're. Gonna. [Speaks Baltimore]. Like. It."

"There! Was that so hard, hon?"

"Yes! You lunatic!" Massachusetts grabbed at the shirt like a dog that was forced into an ugly Christmas sweater by their owner.

"Well you look swell." Maryland said. He pushed himself up and swiped at any dirt and dust he accumulated from the tussle. "Go ahead and finish packing now. I need to drop the rest of these off."

Maryland left Massachusetts writhing on the floor and moved onto the next states. All of them were infinitely more cooperative than Massachusetts was. Maine had grumbled a bit like his brother. But he still took the shirt and put it on.

They were together in the living room, all 8 of the M states in their matching new shirts. Massachusetts was doing his best to cover the shirt. Michigan, Minnesota, and Missouri were pointing out the different shapes to each other and trying to figure out which shape represented which state. It was pretty easy to conclude the bear was Montana.

"Alright! We're leaving for our beach day! Have fun in your meetings!" Maryland waved to the members of the house who weren't going with. Those members grumbled into their cups and breakfast. The M states ignored them and waved as they left the house.

"Shotgun!"

It was hard to tell who shouted it first. Maine, Mississippi, or Montana. The three raced for the passenger seat of the van. Pushing and shoving each other.

"Hey now hons, there's no need to fight. The doors ain't even unlocked yet." Maryland called after. He held up the van keys in one hand.

Massachusetts came up from behind Maryland and snatched them. "I'm wearing' yah stupid shirt. I get to drive the cah."

He unlocked the doors so that the mad scramble could continue. Maryland huffed behind and joined the three Midwestern states in climbing into the back seats. Massachusetts settled into the driver seat. He didn't even acknowledge what was happening next to him until a winner was decided.