Second Arrangement

CHAPTER 20 - OUT IN THE OPEN

JACKSON

I always deemed myself as a man. A manly man. Not a coward. But right now, I was doing the most cowardly thing that I've ever done. I avoided her and even counted it to the second. Since her last story, she uploaded something once a day as usual. And it's been three days. I had to say that it was really kind of her for posting herself, and not just her schedule board, or her crocs, or even her lunch. I could see her, even though I could only see her eyes above the mask. Unconsciously, I traced her face on my phone screen. I missed her. I missed her so much. I wanted to see her in person. I wanted to hear her voice, telling me her stories. I wanted to force her to eat, even though she hated me for it, but she ate them eventually. I wanted to drag her out to dates. We've only gone on one date! One date! Unbelievable... I wanted to grab her hand and hold it in mine. I wanted to hug her, so bad.

"What are you doing moping there?" Jinyoung's voice broke my trance and I pouted instantly. He really had the perfect timing to annoy me.

"I'm not moping," I retorted.

"Yes, you are. You're looking at your phone, looking all sad and pathetic. That's moping, in my book," he continued mocking me.

"Shut up, just shut up man," I punched his arm but it felt like hitting a wall. This guy has been hitting the gym like crazy. "Just let's just go back to work and finish it quickly."

"So you can go back to China? Miss Ellie already?" he tried to fish something out of me, but I ain't giving it to him. This time, I was going to keep it to myself. Later, I would tell him, but not now.

"No," I lied. "I stopped whatever I was doing there abruptly so I needed to finish here so I could go back there and finish there. My crew has been on my ass since I left them as well," I grunted, referring to my Panthepack crew and he chuckled.

"Serve you right for ghosting people."

That night, after a long day at the studio, I couldn't help it anymore. Looking at the time, I was sure that she was at home already, if her surgeries finished as planned. One benefit that she could reap from doing elective surgeries like these was she wouldn't have to be at the hospital until late at night. Usually the surgeries would be finished at 6 PM max because of the hospital policy. Somehow for the elective surgeries, it shouldn't have lasted over the working hour? I knew it sounded weird, but that was Ellie told me when I asked her about it. I held my phone anxiously as my finger hovered over her contact. One button and I would be able to see her face on my screen. If I dared to press it. After taking a big breath, I closed my eyes and pressed the call button. This was it.

I knew waiting was a hateful thing to do, but it became more unbearable as I heard the ringing tone echoed in my room, disrupting the silence in the air. Then after what seemed like forever, she picked it up. She picked up my call. I panicked and pressed the video call button accidentally. And she accepted the request to switch to the video call. Shoot. I quickly straightened myself and made sure that the lighting was bright enough so she could see my face clearly. I put the phone slightly away from me so she could see my whole face and it felt like the first time I saw her after she was gone for a year. There were mixed emotions inside of me when I saw her face. And her eyes. They were filled with relief and worry at the same time.

"Hi," I breathed out after a few seconds of silence. We just stared at each other before I broke it.

"Hi," her voice croaked as well. It sounded like she tried to suppress her tears. I felt a squeeze in my heart, knowing that I might be the reason behind her unspilled tears.

"How's your day?" I tried to start with lighter topics. As much as I wanted to discuss the real reason why I ran away, I didn't have the heart to jump straight into that.