Finding You

V- Background

Bella

Do you know the feeling when you're sleeping and having peaceful dreams and then all of the sudden you fall. You keep falling and falling and falling until you wake up.

That's how my life is.

I have good, fun and pleasant days but then something happens or insecurities kick in or I remember some of my worst memories and it all crumbles down.

I lived in Portugal until I was five years old. I moved to the United States because my parents got divorced. My dad is American so he already had a house here but my mom is portuguese so she had to stay there, unfortunaly.

My dad didn't want my mom to come with us and although she fought really hard to have custody over me, my dad won and she didn't have the money to move overseas.

I spent almost all my life in airplanes going back and forth to be with both, my mom and my dad.

At some point he met a woman. She was mean and rude towards me. And when they decided to get married, she didn't want me to go, because as she said I was a "stupid little kid".

I begged my dad not to marry her and he actually almost went through with it until the very last second when he left her alone at the altar.

I think that was a turning point on our relationship since he started to see me as his daughter and not something to use against my mother.

Two years ago, when I was sixteen, I met Henry. He was my first boyfriend. He was nice, popular, gave me flowers and respected me.

Until he didn't.

There was a time in my life where I was fat and before it got out of control I asked my mom for advice, went to a nutritionist and to the gym and after some time I was healthier and started to like my body.

I still have a few belly rolls and a lot of stretch marks but they're a part of me so I learned to love them.

So when Henry would tell me he was ashamed to be seen with a girl like me or he would laugh at me if I felt pretty or even when he told if I didn't have sex with him it was because I didn't love him, I would get very insecure and tell myself he had every right to be mad at me.

One day my best friend, Nolan, saw me crying and when he asked why I was upset I couldn't hold it anymore so I told him everything Henry did to me.

To say he was angry was an understatement.

He comforted me and on the day he "talked" with Henry. After that I broke up with him and spoke to him ever again.

It took me a while to feel confident about myself again so when Miles ex replied to a photo of Miles and I, he had put on an Instagram story, saying that I wasn't pretty nor good enough for him, I was sad because all of those feelings I felt two years ago came back.

"She's just trying to get a reaction out of us, don't mind her" He said.

"Yeah I'll try"

I'm not ready yet to tell him about my issues but someday I will.

"Now come on, let's meet with the rest of the group"

"I'll be right there"

Right now we're at my dorm because we were working on our projects together since we needed the same materials.

pff that's the only reason we're doing our work together

I grabbed my jacket and my purse and walked to his car.

Right now we're going grocery shopping with everyone since last time only Olive and Mira went grocery shopping, they didn't bought anything because they forgot where they going in the middle of the road and went to McDonald's.

I love them but God they can be so
dumb

After we got back I had a chill night reading a book, talking with Isis and absolutely not thinking about Miles.

...

Author's note

Hello beautiful people, I hope you enjoyed the chapter :)

If you want to comment suggestions or just something you can write them here

This chapter was to know more about Bellas background

And if you need someone to talk to or even vent, I'm here for you <3

Remember to comment and vote

I love you ❤️,

-C