angel || l.huntzberger

party hardy

"i have so drinked before"

My first chemo consult was a stressful experience, to say the least. And we haven't even gotten to the chemo part yet. The doctor pretty much told me about what was going to happen over the next few months. I knew it wasn't going to be easy.

I cannot believe I'm gonna be bald.

The hardest part is going to be telling people. How will I tell Luke? Or my mom? Or Rory? Or Joan? It's not like I can hide it from them. I can try, but eventually it's gonna come out. Just like my hair will...

Think about the positives, Stella.

On the bright side...

I have my car back. I still have a job.

A job to pay all the medical bills I'm gonna have.

Positives, Stella.

I have Jess back.

That's definitely a positive.

After the consult I made my way back to my dorm, hoping that I can cram some extra study in before Jess came over. As I walked in, my cell started ringing and I quickly pulled my keys out of the door with one hand, using the other to grab my phone out of my bag and answer it.

"Hey, how did the consult go?" My brother asked.

"It was... a lot. Are you on your way?" I replied.

"About that... Stell, I am so, so sorry, I can't make it today. This thing came up with my publisher and he wants to meet today – I am so sorry. I promise I will make it up to you. I will be there the first chance I get," He continued profusely apologizing over and over until I finally cut him off.

"Jess, it's fine. Don't worry, I'll be okay. Good luck with your publisher. Just call me when you get a chance," It was hard to hide my disappointment, but I tried my best to be happy for my brother and his success.

"I really am sorry, Stell. I promise I will make it up to you," He promised.

"It's okay, Jess. Call me when you can. Love you."

"Love you more. Cya," And with that, he hung up, and I was left alone.

I tried to get some studying done, but I just couldn't stop thinking about it. I can't even say the word. What's even the point in studying if I might not make it through college? I might not even make it to the end of my sophomore year.

Stop thinking like that, Stella. Positives.

Think positive.

I needed to stop thinking about it. I needed to clear my head. To think about literally anything else.

That is why it felt like a godsend when one of my friends from work and my literature class, Daphne, called and asked if I wanted to go to a party with her later.

Daphne and I weren't much more than work friends, but sometimes we would carpool from work back to school or plan to get coffee before class. It's not like we were best friends or anything. If it wasn't for the fact that we work together, I don't think her and I would be friends, we have nothing in common.

Daphne is a gorgeous, gorgeous girl with these big, blue eyes and perfectly rosey cheeks, legs like a supermodel and a head of long, thick, shiny gold locks. Perfectly straight, white teeth, perfect plump, pink lips, the perfect body that guys drool over. She was the definition of beautiful. I've always envied Daphne's looks.

Daphne's actually decently smart also. Although, she acts like a total ditz in front of guys, which I've never understood. I suppose guys find the whole 'damsel in distress' thing attractive?