EDDIE MUNSON ~ Before I learned The Truth.

I almost said I love you

On the drive back to his trailer, Eddie hadn't cranked the music to an ear-bleeding level like usual and didn't talk at all. When I'd tried to ask what was wrong he insisted everything was fine and he was just tired - when he was asleep my brain tried to blow the situation out of proportion by telling me he was mad at me for something. After a while I was able to fight back and approach it logically - Gareth had arrived in a foul mood and the way he spoke to me was shocking, I figured something must've been said between them that was to blame for Eddie's mood. I set an alarm on my watch to wake me early so I could make him a real breakfast and try make him feel better. Seven hours later the irritating sound of my alarm forced me awake on Monday morning; I turned to check on Eddie quietly snoring away, totally oblivious. The smell of french toast, bacon, and eggs must've been enough to bring Eddie back to the land of the living because he padded out of his room rubbing his eyes and licking his lips. "You cooking something?" he asked sleepily. I plated up the food and poured coffee into a large mug for him, "Breakfast - wanted you to have a decent meal before I go and you live off Turkey dinosaurs until Wayne gets back." I chuckled, watching him salivate over the plate. Eddie placed his hand over mine when we were finished, "That was amazing - thanks. I won't be living off Turkey dinosaurs by the way - I have cereal and toaster waffles too." he winked at me and I just rolled my eyes.

For the rest of the morning we laid on the couch watching cartoons, Eddie's mood was exponentially better than last night and I eventually attempted to talk to him about it. "What happened at Hellfire yesterday?" I asked tentatively, lifting my head to look him in the eyes. Eddie sighed and stopped stroking my thigh, "Honestly it was nothing, don't worry about it." he muttered. "Don't give me that crap Eddie. Clearly something happened, you were acting weird all night." I retorted. Eddie sighed again and shifted to a sitting position, putting his head in his hands. "Gareth's been my best friend for like, forever. He helped set up Hellfire and Corroded Coffin, and he's always had my back, but something's changed." Eddie sounded heartbroken. "I told him something a while ago about how everyone I've ever done stuff with either had to get drunk first or acted as if it never even happened afterwards. Last night he implied you must've been wasted at the party, and that's why you came home with me. It brought all that shit back up and made me feel like dirt again." Eddie continued. I brought him into my arms and rested his head against my chest. "I'm sorry Eddie, you didn't deserve how those people treated you. Gareth was way outta line saying that. You know I'd never need to be intoxicated to want you - right?" I tried to keep my cool when all I wanted was to smash Gareth's head through a window. When Eddie didn't answer me, I took his face into my hands, "You think I would?" I asked, more than a little hurt. Eddie avoided eye contact, "I - no - I don't know. No one's ever really wanted to be with me before, why do you?" He mumbled. I'd never seen this side of Eddie  - vulnerable and insecure - he was always the one laughing loudest and the most confident guy in the room. "Don't ever question that I want to be with you Eddie - I've had a crush on you since we were kids for god's sake," I assertively told him, and a small spark flashed in his eyes just for a second. In that moment I knew I'd do anything to make sure he never felt anything less than perfect. "Just one look at you, or the sound of your voice, is enough to make me happier than literally anything else ever has." I smiled at him and a grin twitched on his lips too. I continued, "I dunno who those people were in your past and I hate that they hurt you, but they're insignificant. You were never the issue Eddie, they were."

Eddie slumped his head into my palm. "My whole life everyone's called me a loser, a freak, a weirdo. I know I said it doesn't bother me now, but sometimes it's difficult to feel good about yourself when people give you every reason not to." He muttered. The pain on his face broke me inside, I couldn't imagine how anyone could ever want to hurt Eddie, but I was slowly learning that he'd been hurt a lot. "What you told me about your dad the other day - it sounds like he was a monster. You were just a kid, you couldn't control anything he did to you. As for everyone else...well... Hawkins isn't made for people like us, they don't understand us so they hurt us." I lightly stroked his rough cheek with my thumb, twisting a strand of his curly hair in my other hand. Eddie leaned back and gave me a half smile, "Good thing we're getting outta here soon then. Man I can't wait to escape this place with you." I pressed my soft lips to his chapped ones, kissing him sweetly a few times, then touched our foreheads together. "There are so many people who love you Eddie, never forget that." He hugged me fiercely, completely unaware that I'd just almost blurted out that I loved him. My heart was racing in my chest. I'm in love with Eddie Munson.