Alina's crib.📍
11:04pm
alina's pov
I stared at myself in the mirror in my bathroom, and watched my tears make my mascara run. my eyes were bloodshot red, because i've been crying.
absolutely nothing makes me this angry, except my mother. and when i'm angry, i cry.
she always knows how to ruin my days, my mood, and basically everything. she judges me for everything i do, i say, what choices i make for myself.
and the funny thing is SHE raised me. SHE taught me everything i know. SHE is the reason 'i am who i am', as she would say.
I looked down at the 2 rolled blunts on my bathroom counter that dd rolled when he was here yesterday, and contemplated smoking. he told me to never smoke unless he was wit me, but honestly i just needed sum right now.
and i didn't want to text him because i knew he was at the studio, working hard wit his music. and i didn't want to interrupt that.
I grabbed a blunt, and shut off my bathroom light before shutting the door, and walking over to sit on my bed. My room smelt like vanilla from the candle burning on my vanity, and it was lit up dimly by my purple led lights.
One thing about me was that my room was always organized, smelling good, and peaceful. I used my room to get away from all the stress, but right now it wasn't working.
my mom and i literally argue everyday over the dumbest shit. they would usually be little petty arguments though.
but tonight, the argument ended in her walking out the house, and driving off in her car. i'll admit, i was a little scared. i'm 15 years old, and an only child. and it's sad to admit, but i didn't know if my mom was going to come back.
anyway, the argument started over dd. which i don't know why because i thought my mom liked him.
she said shit like, "oh he's disrespectful, he's too dangerous, he's gonna get you hurt, he don't care about no one but himself", and so much more. so OBVIOUSLY, i defended him. dd had been nothing but sweet, and respectful to me. he literally treats me like a princess, and i don't know how my mom hadn't realized that.
every time he came over, he would always say hi to my mom and start conversation with her. literally the other night SHE asked for him to come over, and they cooked together. that's what everyone wants in a relationship right? a good bond between their boyfriend and mother. i thought i had that, but of course my mom had to fuck it up.
and the sad thing is, dd really liked my mom. he always complimented her, and tried his best to do right by her. he was even a little shy, and i thought it was so cute.
but like i said, me and my mom always argue. this was our first argument over dd though, and it ended in her walking out. at her grown age, she's getting mad at a 16 year old boy who did nothing to her for what? and i said that too her too, which made her yell even more because she knew i was right.
time skip
I layed out on my bed, staring at the ceiling. It felt like my bed was spinning, but i laid there with a grin on my face.
I was high as fuck.
I smoked one full blunt, and half of the other one. but the weed affected me so much, i was gone.
