My Journey To Freedom (Hyakkimaru X Reader)

Chapter 13

Previously on Chapter 12

I clutch my head frustratedly as I let out a scream. Why do I have to force myself on her? Why can't I just try a softer approach! I should have make her feel comfortable around me... so she can slowly open herself for me. I'm so stupid!!

Y/N... please wake up

-Unstable-

Y/N P.O.V

I slowly open my eyes. My head feels heavy. I have no idea what happened to me. I close my eyes. The last thing I remember is... Tahomaru.

My breathing getting heavier. I can almost hear his voice. The sounds he made as he have his way with me. I clutch onto the front of my kimono, trying to get the sounds out of my head.

"Y/N..." someone said. My eyes snap open at the sound. I turn my head to see Tahomaru. I can see that he looks relieved. "You're finally awake..." he said. He moves closer to me. He lift his hand. I turn my head away, shutting my eyes tightly as I breathe heavily.

"Please... no more..." I pleaded. My whole body start to tremble in fear. I can hear a soft sigh coming from him. "I won't hurt you, Y/N..." he said. I turn slightly to look at him.

He stares at me with eyes full of regrets. I slowly sit down as he stares at me, watching my every moves. "Can I hold you? Just hold you... and that's it, Y/N. I won't do anything. I promise..." he asked. He slowly moves closer to me. I just stare at him, not moving an inch. He slowly wrap his arms around me. I just close my eyes, and a flash of image of what he did comes into my head.

I flinch and moves away from him. He stares at me with a hurt expression. "I-I'm sorry. I... I can't..." I said, my voice cracking. He let out a sigh and nod his head.

"No need to be sorry... I did this to you. I'm the one who should be begging for your forgiveness, Y/N. I am so... so sorry for hurting you..." he said. I turn to look at him. He stares at me with a pleading look. I avert my gaze and stares at my hands, which I place on my lap.

"Please just let me go..." I whispered in a hushed voice. I flinch when Tahomaru pushed me down on the bed, hovering above me. I stare at him in shock.

"Is that all you can think of? Leaving me? Is that it?? Y/N... I love you. Why can't you just try to open your heart for me? Why???" He said, each words louder than the rest to the point he's yelling at me.

I shut my eyes tightly, flinching at how loud his voice is as he speaks to me. His grip on my shoulders tightens. I wince in pain at how hard he's gripping me.

"T-Tahomaru... please, y-you're h-hurting me" I said. I place my hands on his shoulders, trying to push him off me. But he only tightens his grip even more. "O-Ow..." I said, wincing. His eyes widened, realizing what he's doing.

"I'm so sorry..." he said. He drop his head on my shoulder as he starts to cry. I just lay there, not moving. I'm terrified to know what he might do to me if I try to push him away.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. Please forgive me... I promised that I won't hurt you. But I did. I just want you to love me back..." he said. His voice cracks and full of pain. He just wanted me to love him. But I can't... not when I have given my love to Hyakkimaru.

I feel his grip on me loosen, as he lays on top of me. His breathing is soft and even. Seems like he have fallen asleep. I just lay there, not knowing what to do. I can't move with Tahomaru on top of me. I try to calm down, reassuring myself that he's not doing a thing to me. He's only asleep.

***

I open my eyes as I feel Tahomaru moving slightly. He moves his head from my shoulder and looks at me. I just stare at him, without saying anything as I notice a small smile on his face. He still have the look of guilt in his eyes.

"Hey, Y/N..." he said. I just look away from him. I can hear a soft sigh from him. I flinch when I feel a hand on my cheek. He gently caress my skin. I just lay there, not doing a thing.

"What can I do to make you love me back?" He said. I turn my head to look at him. "You know..." I said. He frowns at what I said and shakes his head. "No... if I let you go. You'd leave me..." he said.

"What you're doing isn't healthy... holding me here isn't going to do anything. It will only made me fear you more, Tahomaru. You can't force love. Love is an emotion someone have in their heart that grows after the feeling of reassurance and happiness. But, all you've done... only made me feel pressured and scared. Falling in love with you is impossible. I can't love you" I said. He looks down at what I said. I can see tears streaming down his cheeks.

"So the only thing I can do now... is to let you go?" He said, turning to look at me with tears in his eyes. I just nod my head weakly. He bit his lips. He looks like he's trying to stop himself from crying.

"Is that really the only way? I don't want to lose you, Y/N..." he asked. I just look away from him. My own tears starts falling from my eyes. "The least you can do is give me some space..." I said, turning to look at him.

He seems to be thinking about what I said. He let out a sigh and nod his head. "Alright... I'll give you some space, Y/N..." he said. He slowly moves to stand up.

He turns around and walks towards the door. But before he walks out, he turns to look at me with a pained smile. "I love you, Y/N..." he said. I didn't say anything. He let out a sigh and turn around, finally walking out of my room.

I let out a soft sigh, as I finally feel calm. I slowly move to lay down as I start to feel dizzy again. I gently pinch the bridge of my nose. I slowly open my eyes as the dizziness subsided. I stares at the ceiling and turn to lay on my side. I close my eyes, letting myself drift off to sleep.

*to be continued*