40| Connection

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Bryan's POV:

She was afraid of me. The look of terror on her face and in her eyes crushed my soul, but I couldn't reel Max back in. I had to run. I had to shift. I had to release this anger, this frustration....my fear. The fear of failure. If I fail, she will pay the cost.

After shifting, I raced through the territory to the one place I could clear my head. I wanted answers, I wanted clarity, I wanted peace. I half-heartedly wanted her to follow me, but when the rain began falling, I understood how deeply I had affected her. She had been so strong this entire time, taking things in stride, even accepting us, accepting me.

I reach the landing in no time. Max unleashes a pained howl into the air. He is experiencing the same emotions, maybe even more so, because we haven't finished the mating process. Yes, she is marked, but only because I was forced to mark her. That's not how it is supposed to be done. It wasn't fair to her. It should have been an intimate moment between us, building and strengthening our bond.

I pace back and forth on the landing in the drizzling rain, running my hands through my hair. I am somewhat comforted by the fact the storm has dissipated some. Her fear has lessened, but her concern for me keeps her restless.

"What did you expect? She's your mate and she loves you." I nearly jump out of my skin as a voice breaks through the silence. I turn to see Celeste standing in front of me. I immediately kneel. "You've done well, my child. I know you're frustrated. You have been diligent in your training and are prepared for this war, but I want to ensure Amanda is also prepared. Your plan is strong and so are you....and so is she. Stop doubting your ability, or hers. She is not fragile." I stand and nod.

"She's the strongest person I've ever met. I just want to make sure she's protected and safe. I don't know what I'd do if—if..." my voice fails me as I feel tears escape my eyes. It's been a long time since I've cried and felt this vulnerable. Doubt fills every fiber of me. Celeste walks toward me and places a gentle hand on my shoulder.

"This war is inevitable. You must use the time you have left to get her ready. Your plan is solid. Trust it. Trust yourself. Trust your circle. You've done everything I've asked of you and I promise you will reap the rewards." she smiles gently. I just nod and lower my head. I wipe my eyes and when I look up, she's gone. I let out a shaky deep breath.

I spend the next few hours taking in the sights and sounds of my secret spot. I hear the rustling of the leaves under someone's foot. I don't turn around as I know it's James. He knew I had a secret place, but he has never before entered it as he respected me as his best friend. The closest he has ever come was the night of the rogue attack back in high school. He is here to make sure I am alright. He has never seen me like this, as the roles are usually reversed. I'm the cool-headed planner and fighting strategist. I don't rush in and I keep emotion out of it. But when it comes to her, my heart led the fight. It is definitely new territory for me. And, apparently, for James, too.

"So...." he finally breathes out while taking a seat next to me. "This is the spot. You sure know how to pick them." he takes a deep breath and exhales, taking in the scenery. I continue to stare ahead. "You good, bro?" he asks without breaking away from the waterfall. Am I good? That is a loaded question and I'm not sure I have the answer.

"I'm in uncharted waters here, James. I'm too invested to ever think about quitting on her. She's my world. I don't know what I would do if something happened to her." I chuckle to myself sarcastically as if things haven't already happened. "She's already had her world turned upside down and inside out. How can we ask her for more?"

"We aren't the ones asking. Our hands are being forced. But, because we love her, because you love her, we will do what we can to prepare her. She will not fight alone. We have her back as much as we have yours. Trust me, if I were in your shoes I'd have gone stark mad! You know how hot-headed I can get when it comes to Whitney, but you have to stop doubting yourself. It's time to trust and have faith. The Moon Goddess will bless us for dealing with this monster and saving an innocent." He has no idea how right he is.

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