Save Me - Joel Hokka | Blind Channel

Epilogue

Around a month has passed since the day of the first appointment at the therapist. Blind Channel's Europe tour will start in less then two weeks and before that, they'll have a few last shows in Finland. Today is the first one of them, an all age show in Espoo. But it's not only an exciting day for me because it's the boy's first day of the tour and I'll have to take photos of the show and prove that I was good at my job. I'm incredibly nervous because while the boys are preparing their gig and making sure everything will work out tonight, someone important to me will come to Espoo.

During the last weeks I chatted quite a lot with Jamari and we also called again after the disaster the day he texted Blind Channel. Although we haven't spent time together for years, we get along so well and it feels like nothing has changed, as if we were still as close friends as back then. Since Jamari planned to go to Helsinki this weekend anyway, he decided to go there a day earlier so we can meet in Espoo today.

We agreed to meet at the venue a few hours before the gig and that's why I'm now sitting here, behind the venue where luckily no fans are waiting and seeing me. It's not even November yet but although I'm wearing one of Joel's Blind Channel hoodies and a warm jacket, I'm freezing cold. Well, maybe that's also because I'm sitting on the cold ground.

"Marlene", I suddenly hear Jamari's voice and as I look up, I can see him approaching me. "Jamari!", I happily shout and immediately jump up to hug him. "Wow, it feels great to see you again", Jamari mumbles and hugs me even tighter. "I can only agree...", I whisper while starting to tear up. Seeing him again after all these years feels unreal. I have given up all hope that I'd ever see him again and now he is truly here, holding me in his arms. "I can't believe that you really recognized me only from the pictures on Blind Channel's Instagram..."

"Yeah, me neither... It's crazy. But you barely changed. You're wearing your hair like back then and in general, one can see that you've grown up and that you're now an adult but you still look the same. Also, your body language and the way you move is just like back then. Maybe you stand a bit more upright but only slightly. I think the combination of all that is what made me recognize you and the name of your Insta profile in addition to that."

"I didn't even want them to post a picture in which one can see me... But I guess it's the best they could have done for me", I mumble and hug him closely again. "Why didn't you want that?" "Long story... I'll probably tell you later", I dodge his question because talking about Aava is really the last thing I'd now talk about. "Okay. Then tell me, how is your life now? I mean, I missed fifteen years in your life. What are you doing now? How long have you been with Blind Channel by now?"

"Well, where shall I start? Teija is still my best friend. Do you remember her? She was also at the camp but we didn't spend a lot of time with her. I think I told you about her" "Yeah, I remember. But wow, it's cool that she is still your best friend! Does she live in Helsinki, too?" "No, she doesn't. Actually, she lives here in Espoo and will also come to tonight's show. But about your other questions... I haven't known for a long time. This is my first gig with them and the pictures they posted when you recognized me were the first ones I did of them. A few weeks ago, I quit my job or rather someone else quit it for me – meaning that I was terminated – and now I'm one of Blind Channel's photographers. And apart from that, there's not a lot going on in my life."

"So your life was rather boring before and now it's gonna be exciting and full of new adventures?" Jamari chuckles quietly after asking that. "Yeah, probably. But if I'll really work as a photographer for you, my life won't be as adventurous as I thought it would now become." Jamari truly plans to open up a new photo studio in Helsinki and give me a job there. "So, tell me about you. What happened in your life during the last fifteen years?"

"Well, not a lot either. After school, I studied photography and after working in a few photo studios, I opened my own studio in Kemi where I also got to know a wonderful woman who now is my fiancé. She lost her job in Kemi, too, but the company she works for offered her a job in Helsinki and that's why we'll move there, soon." "So we both have big changes ahead... When will your wedding be?" "It's planned for next summer. Isn't it crazy that when we met, we both couldn't imagine being in a relationship one day? And now I'm engaged and you're in a relationship with one of the most popular musicians in Finland at the moment."