Sex God's Baby

Chapter 4: In the Real World

I find it very difficult to concentrate on anything with my head remaining to fight a never ending battle. I sit silently in my psychology class, listening to my professor go on and on about the different parts of the brain and which part deals with emotions and which part deals with independent intelligence. Honestly, I would go up to him and cut him a new one if I didn't care about my schooling so much. But college is everything right now, which is why I can't let myself get distracted and hurt by an undeserving sack of shit.

I watch as my professor answers students questions then asks for our ten page essays to be turned in. I quickly gather all my things and walk to his desk with the rest of the class.

My professor had a small black basket sat on top of his desk for us to turn in papers. I place mine on top of the pile and begin to turn around to leave.

"Ms. Walters?" My professor asks behind me.

I turn back around to see his worrying eyes laying on me. My eyebrows crinkle in confusion as I walk back towards him.

"Yes?" I ask, my fingers tapping the back of my binder in my arms.

He looks at me with the same worried expression for a bit longer before speaking," You seemed very distant today. Is everything okay?" His voice is a caring tone, with a mix of concern placed inside.

I nod my head numbly, "Yes, I'm fine," I say, then begin walking away as he mumbles words that I have no intentions of listening to.

If I look distant, why would I want to talk to someone about how I am? Honestly, my professors may be intelligent when it comes to book smarts, but common sense? They would be better off spotting a black butterfly at night in a forest.

I walk through the campus hallway 'til I find the library. I walk in and look around to see if Carly is in the room.

She sits all the way in the back at a wooden table covered in Civil War novels and biographies. I start to walk back to her, letting my feet drag on the floor in the process.

"Hi," I say, grabbing a chair next to her and pulling it out from under the table, enabling me to sit down.

Her head is barried in a book, reading away to cram in as much information as she can.

She glances up at me, "Hey. I'm reading." Her eyes dart back to the book.

I set back in my chair, setting down my binders and pulling out an assignment to work on.

I don't know how I am going to tell Carly that I had sex with Danny. I let myself fall into him. I let my head get steamed and my heart was exposed to his charm. How did this happen? How could I have let him get to me once again?

I shove my assignment back into my binder and close it up. There is no point in trying to work on something when my head is fighting itself.

I look up to Carly to see her staring straight at me.

"What?" I ask, her eyes intensively glaring.

"Something is wrong," she states. She shuts the book in her hands, "Spill."

I huff. The bad thing about having a best friend, is you can never hide your feelings from them.

"Something happened with Danny," I say, placing my cheek on my hand and inverting my stare to the table.

"What happened?"

"We had sex," I whisper, not looking up from the table.

"What?" Her voice rings out shocked, "You had sex with him?"

I nod, unable to speak at the moment. She has a confused look upon her face.

"How'd that happen? I thought you hated him," she speaks, remembering all the times I complained about him being my roommate.

"I do... Well, mostly," I say, tracing a scratch on the table with my finger.

"How'd that happen?" She asks again, wanting an answer from my quiet form.

"Well, we used to date, when we were younger, and emotions just surfaced," I say, staring up at her slowly, "but, don't worry. Nothing else will happen."

Her face instantly floods with anger," did he hurt you? I will kick his ass!" she shreaks, banging her hand on the table.

The librarian shushes us from the front desk. Carly's hand clenches into a fist.

"No, he didn't hurt me recently. I can't handle it, to let him in again," I say, crossing my arms on the table and laying my head down on them.

"Well, what's going to happen now?" She asks, tapping her fingers.

"I don't know," I say, shrugging my shoulders.

She gives me a sad look, then leans over and grasps me in a hug.

"Are you okay?" She asks, her voice filled with sympathy.

"Yeah, I'm just drained mentally. I think I'm going to go see if my dorm is empty, then I can take a nap," I say, standing from my seat.

"Here, just go to my dorm," she hands me her dorm key, gently wrapping my fingers around the key.

"Thanks, Carly," I say, giving her one more hug before saying goodbye and walking out of the library and to Carly's dorm.