cold heart - the outsiders

five

taking a drag of my cigarette, I sighed.

"oh you're up." dally groaned. I just stared at him.

"still ignoring me then." he muttered. I rolled my eyes and walked towards my room. he grabbed me and turned me to face him.

"listen. stop acting like this, seriously."

"Dal, I have every right to act like this. maybe you don't get it because you see these boys as your brothers, but I see them as ignorant children who don't like me. I mean, am I that bad? seriously?"

"claud, I get you but you're being so harsh. just lay off. be less mean. fucks sake."

"I'm so done with you. with this. with them and with Tulsa. I'm going back to new York and you can't stop me."

I seen his eyes go large in shock.

"why the hell would you wanna go back there? after everything it did for you? I'm not letting you go back. not on my dead body!" he yelled.

I was zipping the one suitcase I had up and was ready to go.

"Dallas, it's for my own good. in all honesty, I've never been worse in one place. everything is different here. and new York is the one place I belong. it's my home. it isn't where I was born, but it's where my heart is. now will you please let me go?"

"I can't. I promised myself to protect you, and if I let you go back then I'll be breaking it. if I let you outta my sight then I'm breaking it."

"protecting me? PROTECTING ME?! all of a fucking sudden you're protecting me?! you haven't done that once in these three years. in fact, I feel more and more like a prisoner every hour I'm here!  I do love you Dal, but I need to go."

his eyes were saddened now.

"claud, it'll only hurt you. please don't go."

"Dallas, I'm going. whether you like it or not." I said, pushing past him. he let me walk on before running after me and pushing me to the ground. I screamed and tried to fight him.

"Dallas! get off me right now!" I cried. it felt the same as it did before. when dad used to be in his spot. I felt it all coming back.

"you're not going!" he cried. I screamed and lifted him off me. grabbing his shoulder, I punched his stupid face so many times. I'm surprised he didn't die.

"fuck you, Dallas. goodbye." I said, grabbing my bag and leaving.  he slid off the wall and lay there. it hurt me to see him, knowing that I did that but he had it coming.

on the street, my nose was really hurting from the impact of it hitting the floor. all was well until I saw soda.

"claud? what happened?"

"me and dally fought. and I don't think I can ever come back here."

"what do you mean?"

"I'm going back to new York. don't try and stop me, because I'm not changing my mind."

"but...why?"

"because I don't belong here, I didn't before and I don't now." I told him, trying not to cry.

"at least let me clean your nose. come back with me. think this through."

I rolled my eyes. do any of these men listen? I'd had enough of arguements so I agreed.

I thought the gang would be mad because of my argument the other day but they weren't. they were more concerned with my nose.

"jesus Christ Claudia!" darry said when I walked in the door.

"who did this? was it a soc?!" two asked.

"nup. it was dally. me and dally fought. real bad."

"about what?" Steve wondered.

"me moving back to new York." I could feel the tension in the room.

"let me get you cleaned up." darry said. as he was cleaning my nose, the door slammed shut. in trundled dally, he looked like hell. his nose was bloody, both eyes were black and he had many gashes on his face.

"what in the name of God happened to you?!" darry said.

"her!" he shouted. he looked like a dead man walking.

"you did that?!" pony asked, his voice fearful.

"i- yeah. but he-"

"how did you do that?!" soda asked, he was pale.

"I was angry and scared. just don't ask about it."

"you ... hurt me. I don't want you to go to new York Claudia. I really don't." dally said.

"well, I'm going. wether you like it or not. you can't and won't stop me." I shot back.

darry cleared his throat and brought me to another room.