When A Slaughterhouse Becomes A Home (selfcest/tomarry)

twelve

Tom doesn't know what to make of it, this newfound and bizarre revelation that nothing is at all like it seems. Potter is not on his side. Potter has never been on his side. Potter knows something that Tom doesn't, and he has no interest in sharing it.

Something to do with Harry's dreams, his visions. Something he does not want Tom looking into -- and it begs the question, why? What does Potter have to lose by the truth being out in the open?

And what does Tom have to gain?

So Tom doesn't listen. He doesn't listen to Potter's warning that he should be careful who he contacts with this, careful who knows what.

Tom contacts Voldemort, and it is a huge mistake.

Voldemort's response is swift: He can see into Nagini's head? Even sporadically, it is quite troublesome. But also useful. I wonder the reason... I have my theories, and will tell you once I know for sure. For now... let it be known I am trying something out. With the information you have given me, I believe it is possible to lure him in. He loves that godfather of his, doesn't he? You'll know my work when you see it. Let him run into my trap.

He pointedly does not share these theories with Tom. He also does not share this plan of his, nor care how it interrupts Tom's own. What happened to the long haul? What happened to allowing Tom his revenge?

Tom wants Harry to kill himself. He is sure that by the boy being isolated right now -- even by his own volition -- dark thoughts are working their magic. In the meantime, Tom unlocks and influences his Dark tendencies and is looking forward to see what type of new evil he might become before the end of it all.

What right does Voldemort have to interrupt that?

Voldemort... is not on Tom's side either. Voldemort doesn't view them as equals. That much is clear now; Voldmeort views him as a mere follower, a stepping stone, something convenient rather than important. Voldemort is him, his horcrux. But having not contacted him for such a long time, he has grown -- dare he say it -- arrogant. Arrogant to assume that Tom will be by his side forever and needs no special attention or rewards; arrogant to assume that he will not have his own belief systems, separate from Voldemort's own.

He has grown past his prime and now... now he is foolish.

And again the bizarre and unacceptable reality: Voldemort is not on his side. Or rather, Tom is not on Voldemort's -- or Potter's -- or Dumbledore's.

It is Tom against the world, and he is used to feeling like this. He has been alone for decades, him against whatever fortune soul wandered upon his diary.

Now it is him, alone, again.

...With Harry. To an extent, an extent he can't clarify. It is hard to describe what they are to one another -- Harry, poor, ignorant Harry, might have called them friends before everything happened, but Tom is not that softened. He might call it a skewed version of mentor and trainee.

But one thing is clear: he does not hate Harry Potter, even if he wants him dead. He resents him, mildly, for defeating him the first time, and for defeating his other self, making him into the over confident beast he now is.

But he does not hate blindly, nor wholly. To hate such is to pull a wool over the eyes, to acid in the eyes, to blind yourself to the reality. No one is completely good or evil. No one is entirely worth hating; there are bits and pieces of good in everyone, all bits relative.

And while others might find -- and do find -- silvers of Harry evil, or worth loathing... Tom loves them. He takes to them like a moth to flame.

And the reason Harry stayed with him so long even though he's a part of Lord Voldemort, even though he was actively trying to hurt his mental health... he sees, or saw, bits of good in Tom, too.

Now, without Harry, without even Voldemort to turn too, he cannot help but wonder how Harry is doing all alone. Is he troubled? Lonely?

Breaking?

Maybe. Hopefully.

There is the possibility that he may have underestimated the boy -- the future version of him is here; maybe he is stronger than he looks, to have at least survived the first time. But he watches him from secret locations scattered around the castle, and notes the way he zones out in class, the way he doesn't eat and is up working all night. The way he has not returned to Ron and Hermione, even after helping Ron the other night.

It pleases Tom deeply. His plan is working, and once he makes up with Harry (which will happen, of course, Tom doesn't even doubt it), then he'll be pushed even further toward the edge.

It pleases him... but it also makes him ache. There is something fundamentally wrong about Harry hurting so badly. Tom ignores these feelings, because they are thoroughly irrational, and also inconvenient.

Harry Potter is not his friend, he reminds himself. Tom Riddle does not have friends, let alone friends who are actually his mortal enemies. It just doesn't happen.

He reminds himself this, but at the same time cannot help but think that he's a good mentor for Harry, and could absolutely be something more. If only Tom would let himself...

If Tom was genuine in his pursuit, who knew the damage he could do? The things he could sway Harry into? He could warp Harry's mind, his perception of good and evil, let Tom's ideology engulf him until he can't even recognize his old friends. The pair they could make, side by side, brother wands...

They could very well conquer the wizarding world together. Not Voldemort and his Death Eaters, not Dumbledore and his free world, but them, their newfound ideology.

Together.