REMEMBER //larry Stylinson//

chapter 43

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Pillows and bears

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Harry stares at the ceiling, his mind was stuck in some sort of trance as he thought over everything. Well as far as his little mind could, but that didn't stop his big thoughts.

He covered his ears as tears bubbled in his eyes, he felt like his mind was getting pulled apart. Memories the little tried to avoid shot into his head making him want to scream, while his big mind was getting meaningful, cute memories of him and lou that he never remembers whenever he goes big.

His mind was torn, flicking through memories of him giggling when Louis tried to pick him up when he was weak after being strapped to a bed for god knows how long, to then being attacked by Andrew and his eye getting cut.

One moment he had Louis, the next he didn't... Like now. Louis is gone, hurt, in pain, he could be dead for all harry knows. Everyone left him on his own, the doctor, his favourite nurse. Now he's just left with an empty bed opposite him and food in front of him that makes him want to puke.

He couldn't stop the tears, the thoughts, it was all too much. His little mind was being tormented till finally, he was all big, being pulled out of his headspace, everything went quiet, too quiet

He could hear his breathing, his sniffing as he whipped his nose then his tears. Harry didn't know what just happened but he remembered everything, being big and little. Right now he'd do anything to be little again, he was so scared, so many bad things happened to him when he was big. He just wants Louis.

Before he knew it he was crying again, not from pain, he missed Louis, and he was so worried about him. Just as his want grew the door opened. The nurse walked in with a sorrowful face that made Harry's heart drop.

"Hey, darling," the nurse said with a smile "w-where w-we-want l-lou" the nurse sighed pulling up a chair next to harry "he's fine don't worry your little head okay?" Harry was so relieved but he could tell something wasn't right "w-where i-is he, c-c can I see h-him" harry stuttered" moving up the bed like he was getting out making the nurse immediately stop him

"We had to put him in an induced coma, we found no trace of his medication meaning he hasn't been taking it which made him worse, well wake him up once he's stable enough, but right now it seems he hasn't been listening to us" harry freezes before remembering waking up without Louis

"C-can i- can I see him" the nurse shakes her head "p-please i-i need t-to be there" she frowns "I'm sorry harry we can't let you" harry shakes his head biting his lip as tears bubble from his eyes. The nurse sighs "I'm gonna change his sheets ill be right over there if you need me" she says patting his shoulder

"w-wait" she stops as she stands up "c-can y-you take a-away the tray p-please" the nurse frowns looking at Harry's plate in the sorrow of the amount he's consumed "of course I can," she says with a smile quickly taking it away with concern

Harry breathes out a shakey breath as he lies back down finally, he didn't know what to do, he knows he can't do anything but his heart aches without Louis, he just feels so vulnerable

Harry held back his tears as the nurse walked back in with a sigh "time to change these sheets, he would never let me change them" harry chuckles slightly remembering Louis's argument something about 'disturbing his softness' and 'working hard to make the paper like bedding comfy'.

"Oh my god," the nurse says from across the room, harry immediately tries to sit up as he watches her pull the pillow off the bed onto the floor "w-what is it?" Harry asks. He watches as she reaches over and then stands back up "he's been hiding his pills under his pillow"

Harry was shocked, he remembered Louis taking them, this has to be a joke. Harry thought and thought as the nurse picked up the pills moving them to the side table where his card stood next to Freedom

She changed the sheets leaving the dirty ones on the floor and made the bed. Just as she was about to walk away harry stopped her "d-do you t-think I can have h-his pillow" harry bit his lip at the request, worrying she'll think he was a weirdo, thinking she was judging him for every word that came out of his mouth, he half expected her to hit him with it out of disgust.

She didn't, she cooed slightly and handed it to him with a smile "do you want freedom too?" Harry shook his head "d-do you t-think y-you could give i-it to l-lou?" She smiled "of course, I can harry" she picks up the washing moving out of the room before returning and taking the bear and the pile of pills while harry hugs Louis's pillow

The second she left harry buried his face into Louis's pillow smelling it as tears bubbled in his eyes from embarrassment, feeling weak and missing Louis.

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