Just Breathe

Chapter 22

Bruce was so much braver than she was.

Not for the first time, he had bared his soul to her - quite literally. He had offered up his mind, his thoughts, his memories, and the deepest, most hidden parts of his soul to her invasive touch. All to prove his love for her.

She needed to do the same.

They couldn't start their lives together while she was keeping a secret from him. A secret that was already eating away at her, and filling her sleep with nightmares.

She swallowed nervously, unsure how to start.

He squeezed her hand in support. "Beth, you can tell me anything."

She dropped her eyes to study their entwined hands. "I never answered you the other night, when you asked what had happened to my father before you arrived in the lab." She licked her lips and continued. "Connell, um, found out that my father was double crossing him. He shot him in retaliation."

"Okay," Bruce said slowly. He sounded confused at the unexpected direction of the conversation.

"The reason he knew that, was because I told him. I got the chance to 'read' my father. I knew I needed some bit of dirt that would turn Connell against him. I wanted to get out of from under his control any way that I could."

"That's understandable, Beth, you-"

"I lied," she blurted out, interrupting him.

"What?"

"I made it up. My father never double-crossed Connell. I made it up, and I got him killed."

She risked a glance at his face, but his expression was unreadable. Heart pounding, the rest of her confession spilled out of her. "I'm so worried that it means I'm like him - manipulative. Scheming. A murderer."

"Beth, no." He squeezed her hand. "You did what you needed to do to survive."

"It doesn't feel that way. It feels like I did it to punish him."

"And I'd never judge you for that. Beth, you know what I do at night. You know that I've spent the last three years punishing criminals-"

"But you don't kill them!" she cried. "You have such a strong code about it. You don't kill...and I did. And I'm so scared that you'll think less of me because of it." She tried to pull her hand from his as tears started to fall from her eyes.

But he wouldn't let go. He tipped forward off the coffee table, coming to his knees before her. "You didn't pull the trigger, Beth. That's not on you - you can't control what other people do. You were desperate and scared and angry and I don't blame you at all for what you did. Do you hear me? This doesn't change how I feel about you a single bit. You know its true." He squeezed her hand to remind her that she was still connected to him.

Could still read him.

She looked into his heart...and discovered he was telling the truth.

He still loved her - just as much as before.

She laughed with relief, the sound wet with her tears. "Thank you," she said, the words feeling utterly inadequate.

He brought his up to her face, and wiped away her tears with his thumbs. She leaned into his touch and smiled at him.

"Any other revelations you need to share? Any more secrets?" he asked.

She shook her head. It was the truth, but he only had her word on it. The discrepancy between them felt so unfair in that moment. "I wish I could give you my power - even just for five minutes - so you could know me as thoroughly as I know you. So you could see how much I love and adore you."