That's when your breathing stops , is it my dad? Someone else?
Please let it be someone else.
Until a police car shows up in your driveway , until you open the door.
Hear the words "Im sorry to inform you , but he passed away".
'It will get better' , they tell you , 'You are handling it so well' they tell you. It wont get better , easier? maybe. People don't know how you handle things , the hours between 1 am and 6 am , the hours when they are not around. They can't see you cry. They worry more about my brother than me , he's not handling my dad's death very well. He's been punching walls, picking fights. Showing that he's not all-right.
People don't know how hard it is living with my brother , a narcissistic person who only thinks about himself. I lost my dad too , my mom lost her husband , everyone he loved lost him. It's not only about yourself. People think i handle it well because i don't talk , i got it from my dad. I know i should talk , but how can i talk when every word i wanna say gets stuck in my throat.
Sometimes i wanna just get out of this house , escape it all. Go out with friends. Go to school. And then the hard reality kicks in , i'm not going to school , and i don't really have friends.
i wanna live like other teenagers do , go out , get wasted , kiss boys. Not that i would , i'll probably chicken out since even holding hands scares me.
I'm trying. I really am , i just wish some people would see what i'm going through instead of telling me 'it will get better' , how do you know?
YOU ARE READING
Seven
Romancea girl who had everything , a happy family, a great friendgroup , good grades. It's crazy how much can change in a year time. She lost her friends , her grades dropped , she stayed home most of the time. And the tragic loss of her father. millions...
