no more pain

244 9 6
                                    

Eyeyeyey, guess who's back!

Hope you kept this in your library XD
How are you?

Also this is deep. Like I feel exposed by this chapter.

Have fun and please comment because it makes me so happy and you gays always make me laugh <3

Warnings:
hospital?

- - -

The first thing I notice when I wake up is the steady high-pitched beeping of a heart monitor.

The second thing is pain.

I feel like someone stabbed me right in the chest. Multiple times. Luckily the slightly numbed version where someone is litterally injecting painkillers into your blood stream.

Groaning I force my eyes to open and am immediately blinded by the bright white ceiling of a hospital room. I can hear shuffling next to me and a second later a face appears between me and the ceiling.

A mob of obnoxiously blue hair, unnaturally light skin and a single dimple...

"Dev?" I try to say but it comes out as a dry and raspy breath.

"Kier! You're awake!" He cheers loudly.

I flinch at the noise and he quickly shuts his mouth an embrassed but also amused look on his face. I can't help but grin back despite the piercing sensation across my torso.

"How do you feel?"

"Like shit." I mumble still smiling at him (which probably makes me look like an idiot with the aftereffects of the anaesthesia).

"Well, guess what: You can complain later! Look at your chest!"

"My wh-" I stop mid-word speechless at what I'm seeing.

... Or rather what I'm not seeing.

Is this a dream?
There's no way in hell this is real...
This is the best day of my life!

Adrenaline shoots through my system making my whole body shake with excitement.

"Holy shit" I croak out my voice trembling "I-... I'm actually flat. I don't have- I'm a guy. I look like...  I- Holy fucking- Oh my god! Look at me, Dev, look! I did it!"

"Yeah, holy shit... I'm so proud of you."

My eyes burn with tears and I try to lift my hand up to my face to wipe them away. Dev stops me though by grabbing my hand and pushing it back to my side.

Of course I immediately protest. "I'm crying, dude, let me-"

"You gotta stop moving until the doctor's here. You were supposed to be out for another hour, idiot."

I scoff "What are you, my mum?"

"Shut up."
Before I can come up with a good reply he moves his hand to stroke his thumb over my cheeks.

"Wh-"

"See, no more tears. You're welcome."

"Whatever."

"Woooow, grateful as always."

"You're acting like my-"

"Daddy?"

"I'm in hospital, Dev."

"I was just joking."

I give him an unimpressed look.

"Unless-"

"StOp!" I shout trying to hide my grin.

"Just because you suck at flirting doe-"

"Just because you suck di-"

"That's so homophobic. I'm gonna tell twitter."

I can't hide my laughing anymore.
"Oh yeah, because I'm homophobic!"

He mimics a teacher pointing at a textbook and says in a horribly British accent
"Being gay doesn't make you a good ally."

"I'm gay and trans and I..."

I just got top surgery. I'm free.

"Did you're brain blow out from all the heavy thinking?"

I simply shake my head smiling at him.

He narrows his eyes tilting his head in confusion.

"I'm just happy. Like way too happy to think straight."

"Thinking straight never really was your stro-"

"I just can't believe I got the surgery. I've been dreaming of this for like the last 8 years..."

Dev relaxes and smiles back at me with that stupid dimple in his cheek. With a fluttering feeling in my stomach I continue.

"And... it feels like my life has just begun. And I'm so happy that you're here. Even if my parents had wanted to come, I still would've asked you."

His eyebrows lift in surprise but then he grins.

"And I would've come with you anyway, idiot."

"I love you, Dev."

"WhAt-you- did you just say..?"

"Won't say it again. Now give me my good morning kiss, I've just woken up and I clearly need rescue breathing."

"Maybe I'll just let you die."

"Woooow! I just told you I love you for the first time and that's your reaction?"
I try to dramatically put a hand to my chest but he once again stops my grabbing my other hand too.

"I love you, Kier. And I'll save your life... for now."

My heart does a stupid, cheesy, little jump at that and my ears turn warm when leans down to kiss me.

"Thank you for coming here, Dev." I whisper.

"I'm so happy for you." He smiles.

Dev's lips are soft and he is warm and gentle and makes sure to not touch my chest.

My chest that is flat and despite the pain and trouble breathing so so comfortable.

I love Dev.

And I finally feel like I can start loving myself too.

- - -

Yes, I'm trans.
And yes, I'm a softie.
So what?

Hope you enjoyed (:

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