" Never have I ever kissed a boy" I turn my head to the boy in the Yale sweater. He gazes at me with those hazel eyes and shiny white teeth. I imagine my forehead pressing with his, pink pearly lips connecting with mine.
" What a waste of a pretty f...
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K I E R A N
" I'm sixteen, I shouldn't be working this early in the morning on a Saturday." I shove a mouth full of chocolate pancakes down my throat. My brother walks around the table. " School not any different than what you're doing now" He shrugs his shoulders and grabs his football bag. He's playing tackle football without pads. Sometimes I wonder why I bother with him. Probably triggers something within me because my parents are dead but it's not like my uncle and aunt care about our safety.
" Uh, where's my phone?" I retrace my steps to where it might be. " So irresponsible. You lose your wallet, sunglasses, virginity or wait! Have you?" I notion a no because it's really embarrassing that I'm still a virgin.
" Got it mixed up with -
" Him? Wow? Taking a big step bro" Mark interrupts me boldly. " I never meant for this to happen; my sexuality is kept on lock for a reason, no one knows except for him and you now so please keep it that way"
" Good for you, you deserve someone great; Not some douche who thinks he's all that" Mark shoulder bumping me lightly. I soft sigh releases from my mouth. I turn to the burning rising sun, looking out the dusty tainted window. Yet with a steady beat, my heart starts to pound and pound faster and faster until the silent force of eye contact collide.
Under the arch of the car window exterior. The reflection of Tommy Oakley sunglasses reach my face. I walk, arms crossed, head held high. The appalling looking Jeep Gladiator, filthy as can be. Couldn't take my crooked not yet broken heart off of it. My eyes glared and hardly become unfocused. The car is somewhat very distracting. I descended the driveway, bent down. Suddenly the sound of his soft voice catches my attention.
The most sweetest offering of entering his car and his grungy room. I quietly gasp for air. Believing this is reality. Drenched in the shower. Wet hair. Closed doors. Stained sheets. Dirty Daydreaming. Smelly gym socks.
I sit my ass in the car onto the leather material, Tommy scrolls through his Spotify playlist and I come across a Chase Atlantic one. " Turn it the fuck up" I scream the words to the song out the window. Mark waves his hand goodbye and the smile upon my face knowing I'm aggravating him but don't give a fuck.
" The random cars rides at 12am; Showing up at Starbucks; The intense gazes; Are you sure we're just friends?" I ask while he takes his eyes off the road. " You know I like you but this is something we do for fun and maybe we can be more in the future..." We pull into the Target parking lot. I grasp ahold of his large yet muscular boney hand. Look into those autumn brown eyes. The echo of the rushing vehicles passing by and the rattling shopping carts. I can hear the screeching of the child next to me. The mother didn't look too pleased by my overly sweaty body that charmed my partner in front of me.
I shuddered in fear. Gulped strongly and then felt my junk area to check if I pissed my pants. Seeing the cross necklace around her neck. I knew possibly she's homophobic by the disgusted look on her face. She wasn't pleased by the visuals of our love story. As she looked at the boy in the driver's seat, noticing the vinyl cross sticker. I knew she pondered in her mind that us two boys were going to rot in hell. Almost cried my eyes out watching her expressions.
" Put your shirt back on." Tommy demands as he sticks his bottom lip out. " I'm sorry, bro; I feel like I'm taking advantage of this" I apologize. I open the door saying that I'll walk home if that's what he wants. The tear in his eyes causes my heart to thump and almost drop.
" It's not you; I wish we can run off to New York or Paris without looking over our shoulders every time the words, you're confused comes out of my parents mouth." He plays with his thumbs and all I want to do is hold him in my arms. I felt horribly sorry and I can't shake this feeling of confronting his parents.
" We're going to be okay, I promise." I rest my head on Tommy shoulder as the sun fully rises. Finally arriving at the coffee shop. My watch strikes 7am. " Goodbye, Kieran." I try to push past the nauseating mental wounds that hurts my broken heart. As my door slams shut. I wonder if I'll ever Tommy again.
DON'T FORGET TO COMMENT. VOTE. HELPS OUT VERY MUCH XOXO ANNA
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