Glass Breaks Too Easily. (Eyeless Jack x Reader Book 2)

Prelude.

Once in a while, I'd see that familiar flash of blue in a reflection. 

Standing behind me as I glanced at myself in the mirror after a shower, I'd see it there. I never really cared for the color blue and knowing that the color tied directly to the love of my life made me all but resent it. It was ironic, and, perhaps, a bit pathetic to have known that I survived every obstacle that my life, both mortal and newly immortal, had thrown at me, yet a simple color could send me spiraling. Nonetheless, I allowed myself the inconvenience of longing; of missing someone. 

I had been allowed to keep all of my memories, much to my dismay. I was hoping my slate would be wiped clean; if he wasn't going to return, why was he something I needed to remember? I found myself all a bit too consumed with the fact that the statement now applied to two different men for two different reasons.

It was strange. I was willing to accept losing the memory of Jack more than I was the memories of Henry. He seemed to fuel me from beyond the grave with his drunken stupors; his hatred became my own and I channeled it into my training.

Henry's hateful words were something I could manipulate. I could twist his words into power like he had done; I could turn his abuse into unbridled strength so potent that Jeff himself had to coach me on how to contain it. Jack's words, however?

I could be angry about him leaving, and I absolutely was. He had left me at a time when I needed him the most, and he knew that. I could understand not wanting to see me fail the training, but what I couldn't understand was leaving under the impression that I would undoubtedly die. I hadn't assumed he was the type to give in to weakness so easily, though when he had made up his mind about something, plausible or not, to him, it was genuine fact instead of just possibility.

But I should have known better. He had taught me so early on not to assume anything about him; he would prove all logic regarding him to be just wasted thought and would transform assumptions into nothing but silence as he wordlessly answered every accusatory question. Though, this time, I had questions he wouldn't answer. I had questions he couldn't answer; he didn't know me enough at this point to know how to respond. It wasn't just the fact that I wasn't human anymore that would boggle him, hell, it had all still boggled me. It would be the simple fact that I no longer needed him, yet still, regardless of everything, regardless of the boiling, seething-hot rage I felt when I saw flashes of navy blue haunting me, I wanted him. To no longer need him but want him was something I highly doubted Jack could handle. Our entire relationship, if that was even an appropriate name for it, was based on him holding my life in the palm of his hand. Now, however, it was very likely that it could be the other way around should he find himself sulking back to that dreadful mansion with his stupid navy blue mask. 

However, there were a few things about me that had remained unchanging despite the strenuous training and conditioning made to erase all of my more redeeming qualities.

I had earned the rather crude nickname of 'pestilence' due to my death grip on my infectious humanity' though it had been used as something of a degradation tactic at first, it became a semblance of term meant for endearment. To know that my humanity was infectious, to know that simply being around me gave the people I had come to love a little grip on something they had once loved so much was more than comforting.

I couldn't bring back the Tim that existed before Masky and I couldn't comfort the crushed soul that was Toby before he picked up those hatchets, but if I could provide them even a moment of extremely short-lived clarity that resulted in happiness, I was okay with that.

I could hide how much I missed Jack, and I could hide how much his absence affected me. But I couldn't hide from my duties, and I couldn't hide from The Operator.

Jack may have claimed me as his at one point in time, but claims were just assertive nothings without backing action.

"You ready, (Name)?"

I nodded in the direction of my partner. I had always felt close with Toby, even if we hadn't really started on the best terms, so becoming fourth-tier proxy and partner to Tobias Erin Rogers was one of the easiest tasks I had been assigned. Though having a strong connection with a partner when on the field was all but required, outside of the field, it could become a bit dangerous. Sometimes, it was as if Toby could read my thoughts. I often wondered if he could.

He quickly tilted his head in the direction of the door; I still took residence in Jack's cabin. As far as I was concerned, it was mine. 

After all, the note, hand-written and signed sitting prettily folded in my jacket pocket let me know it was mine in black and white.

Though, the cabin wasn't all that Jack had promised me in that stupid little note. Perhaps the only thing stupid about the entire situation was me.

How stupid of me to have believed he would ever come back. He wanted his freedom, and when he got it, I should have known he was going to take it. I thought that maybe giving up my own freedom to be beside him would have meant something, anything.

I smiled bitterly to myself as I rose from my seated position on the couch I had once sat on with Jack right beside me. The day that Brian had shot me; the day I had become immortal.

Maybe I had stood just a little too fast is what I thought to myself as I saw the ghastly outline of his form hovering over my own, IV needle ready to be placed. I saw myself, tears running down my cheeks and mouth moving rapidly but no words coming out.

I whispered along to my own lips moving; it felt like knowing the entire script of a movie.

'I have feelings for you, Jack...'

Toby nudged me, and with the momentary relief from my hauntingly loving daydream, I made a start for the door. 

Henry fueled me with hatred. Jack fueled me with impossibly desolate desperation. I was still trying to figure out which was more dangerous.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I BRING YOU THE RE-WRITE OF THE SECOND BOOK AND IT'S GOING TO BE SO MUCH BETTER SO FASTEN YOUR SEAT BELT AND GET FUCKING READY FOR SOME ANGSTY ANGSTY CONTENT.

I missed writing for Glass eye so much, yall have no idea. This is like watching your baby grow into a toddler who can saw a few words. I feel like I'm watching my toddler take their first steps ;-;

I hope you all are just as excited for this book as I am, and I'd like to do a few dedications. First, I'd really like the first person to read this little prelude to be my no.1 supporter who has been from the jump, lolEdgelord.

I'd also like to dedicate this book to the many incredible souls I have lost this years. I hope the afterlife is everything you've ever wanted and more. And Nana, I hope you have all the coconut bars in heaven that you could ever ask for.

Here's to another emotional rollercoaster, cheers. <3

If you're going to Meatball...you know the drill.

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