b a c k b u r n e r

one

"I'm drowning in your memory but it is all that I have left "

***

Aubrey was shaking when she saw Kieran packing up his boxes. The labels on the boxes are stern and clear, as he has finally found a new place not far from their current house. House, as Aubrey does not dare to call it home. This place is not home for her. This place is just a ghost town haunted by every piece of the person they used to be. She didn't know when did he fell out of love with her, but she didn't want to ask.

" Kie? " her voice is unsure, and the black-haired boy immediately stops what he's doing and gazes up her black orbs.

" I don't want to sell this place. I-I was thinking, that- " Her voice is now shaky, and she knows that she's seconds away from breaking down in the living room.

" It's okay, you can stay here if you want. " he smiled. Kieran smiled softly and Aubrey swears that she used to see this smile of him every day.

The twenty-one-year-old nods before leaving him alone, making her way back to the bedroom. The bed sheet is still the same and there, she can see them, laughing together over Harry Potter. 

***

" Wake up. Aubrey, wake up "

Kieran rubbed her face softly, tracing her asleep features with his hand. Aubrey's eyes were fully closed and her lips parted a little, letting out a soft snore.

" Baby, wake up, I'm hungry "

By now, he already had his body over hers, hugging her and nuzzling his face on her neck. Aubrey is his safe space. 

" Kie, I'm sleepy " her morning voice finally responds.

" Let's buy the breakfast burrito in front of the street. I know it's your favorite! "

Aubrey groans before burying her face in his hair, inhaling the scent of brown sugar, her favorite scent. Kieran laughed before kissing her neck, letting her sleep again. Fuck breakfast burrito, Audrey is his everything.

***

" Mum called. She invited us over for lunch. Get ready, okay? "

Kieran yelled, leaving Aubrey speechless. She just woke up and she hasn't even cleaned their home.

" Can you tell Mum that we'll be late? I haven't cleaned up! " Kieran chuckled before making his way to her, ruffling her hair in the process.

" The house can wait. You know how mum gets when we're late. She loved it when we went out with her. "

" Will there be Aunt Eggy? I swear her personality doesn't sit right with me. She asks questions that even mum gets irritated by " she mumbles while making her way to the bathroom.

Kieran lets out a laugh before opening their drawers and pulls out a pink tie-dye oversized sweater. 

" We'll probably just play Ludo and hang out at that cafe mum adores. "

" I swear mum gets the youngster on her more than us. "

Aubrey gets out of the bathroom and tossed Kieran his shorts, before putting on the pink sweater Kieran sets for her. Simple things like hanging out with his mother made her wish that this stay on forever.

***

A soft knock on the door brings back Audrey to reality. There, Kieran stands, holding his backpack. His hair was everywhere and his shirt was a little wet from his sweat. 

" I'm leaving, A. Do you want to come with me and check my new place? "

Aubrey shakes her head before going to him, pulling him for a hug. He is shocked by the gesture but manages to hug her back. Aubrey closes her eyes, inhaling his scent for the last time. Never did she ever think this day would come.

" Take care, okay? Tell me if you need anything. I'm always a call away. "

Kieran smiled and nodded. He is cursing her and her personality. He breaks this girl so many times, she could probably write 10 songs about 9 ways he fucked her over. Every time he messed up, she was there to put their pieces back together. He's cursing her existence because he knows, no matter how much this hurts her, if he calls in the middle of the night and asks for a cup of tea, she will drop everything and go to him.

Kieran hates that he's the cause of her pain. He knows how much Aubrey loves him and it pains him that he's also the same reason Aubrey is not who she is right now. He hates that he changed her and took away the life she had before. Kieran and his selfish appetite. Leave it up to him to fuck it up without a good reason.Before him, she was something else. 

Before Kieran, Aubrey was a whole different person. She was a straight A's student and the top of her classes. She was her family's pride and joy. She was set to be the next lawyer and Kieran blurred it all out in just one night.Aubrey first met Kieran while she was swiping endlessly in Bumble. She just got out of her previous relationship and Kieran's pics-that time with a white t-shirt and black cap; interest her. Without hesitation, Aubrey swept right and they instantly matched. They started as a random joke. 

On the third of November-only six days after they matched, both only talked on the phone once, Kieran asked her out. It was supposed to be a fun and no feelings attached kind of relationship. They were supposed to only mess around, but ten days later, Aubrey fell for him. He sang a song that night while they were face timing-both hadn't met in person, and there, Aubrey fell. She fell hard.

Ever since that, they've been face-timing nonstop, and by the 29th of November, they met and Kieran took her out. Their first date was at an Indonesian Diner called 'Warung Nasi Uduk Lotte' just about downtown. It wasn't much but Aubrey loves it. Kieran was the simplicity she adored. It was heaven while it lasted.

Kieran locks the door behind him and lets out a sigh. He hates leaving Aubrey, but for fuck sake, he knows that he took it too far this time. Truth is, he puts Aubrey through this type of shit too much, he sometimes questioned Aubrey's sanity.

Walking away from the apartment, Kieran left without turning his head back. If he did, he would notice that Aubrey's standing on their balcony, in his old oversized hoodie, crying.

If he turns his head back, he'll realize that he broke her so badly this time.

***

a/n: I'm sorry this took so long, I was busy healing myself from my breakup. enjoy!