Speedy's Big Adventure

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We begin where we last left off, Speedy, ZardeezNuts and the Coke can were on the road, Speedy (being Speedy, as always) was bored out of his mind

Speedy: UGH, I'M SO BORED!
Can: We've only been driving for like, a minute
Speedy: don't blame me, i just get bored very quickly
Can: ok find something to do. Preferably something illegal
Speedy: why didn't ya say so
Speedy goes on his ipad and watches Sonic The Hedgehog 2 on watchmovieshd.com
Can spots 2 strangely dressed women in the distance, and immediately tries to flirt with them
its horrible at it, what'd you expect
???: fuck off can
???: how the fuck can a can talk?
Can: shut up bitch i just CAN
Speedy: IS THAT?!
Panty: name's Panty, and the bitch here is my sister, Stocking
Stocking: shut up Bitchess
Panty: no you shut up
Stocking: no you shut the fuck up
Zardeez: man i wish i had a family to be angry at :(
Speedy stares at Stocking, to him, Stocking looks GORGEOUS
Stocking: what? Why the hell are you staring at me like that
Speedy: you're pretty
Stocking blushes
Panty: what the hell?
Speedy snaps back to reality and blushes
Speedy: i mean, uhh, you look very pretty in that dress, i mean, uhh
Can then played really loud music because it hates love
Speedy: HOLY CRAP!
Panty: MY FUCKING EARS! GOD DAMN IT
Zardeez: Hey this is pretty good, what's it called?
Can:[anime song]
Zardeez: OH NO, I'M ALLERGIC!!
Panty:TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF TURN IT OFF!!
Speedy uses his god like powers to change the Radio channel to random pop music
Oh yeah Speedy has godlike abilities because he wants to, don't ask why
The girls bellies rumbled
Panty: oh shit, i haven't eaten since last night, you guys got anything we could eat?
Can: ok who forgot snacks
Zardeez: it's your rv
Can: i don't need food idiot
Zardeez: Don't call me an idiot, you weren't nice enough to bring snacks onto an rv, made for multiple people to use
Speedy: uhh, i think we should get snacks for the girls
The can stopped at a small store a few miles away from where they were before
The store only had 1 thing in stock,vegan chips
Zardeez: well i'm not eating that
Panty: UGH, IT LITERALLY TASTES LIKE DOG SHIT! FUCK!
Stocking:Take us somewhere else, magic soda can
Speedy notices something else in the store, 2 Sonic Burgers, from Sonic, the restaurant, Complete with a toy!
Speedy: oh look, it's plot convenience, AWESOME!
Speedy dashes over and gets the burgers,
Speedy: here you go, Panty & the lovely Stocking!
Panty: i swear to fuck, you have a crush on Stocking, just confess to her already
Speedy: CRUSH?! N-NO! NOT AT ALL!
Zardeez: you've turned redder than the can of coke
Speedy: what are you talking about? I'm not Red,I- i'm Speedy! i-i do not have a crush on Stocking, ok?
Zardeez: yeeeeaaaaahh suuuurrreee
Can: ok cool just don't have sex in my rv, you know how hard it is to clean love juice off seats?
Stocking: with Panty around, it's not gonna happen, she can't go a single day without having sex
Zardeez: i volunteer not having sex
Can: i will murder all of you if you shove me in any of your holes
Speedy: same, i'm not gonna have sex
Zardeez: ok so i dont exactly want an incest relationship in this store we need a new character
Speedy does some magic bullshit and makes his shirt come to life
Amy: ugh, what just happened
Speedy: MY PRECIOUS!
Speedy goes and hugs Amy, surprising her
Amy: Uhh, who are you? And why did you call me "my precious"?
Speedy: oh, sorry, i forgot to introduce myself, name's Speedy
Zardeez: So is this gonna be a harem adventure?
Panty: it wouldn't surprise me at all, considering this guy's a fucking simp
Speedy: AM NOT!
Panty: ARE TOO!
Can: oh boy crashing the rv seems like a good choice
Can: Nah i like my rv ill keep it
Amy: So what were you guys doing?
Zardeez: Mickey Mouse kidnapped our roommates and hid all of Speedy's sonic merch around the world, don't ask any questions i don't have answers
Amy: Oh no, that's terrible!
Zardeez: i think 90% of it is you and Blaze
Amy looks at Zardeez confused
Amy: what?
Zardeez: Hey Can what do you see ahead?
Can: uhhh some ugly tree in a swamp
Speedy: STOP THE CAR!!!!
The tires screech to a halt
Panty: this place smells fucking terrible
Stocking: makes sense, it's a swamp
Speedy: LET'S EXPLORE!
Zardeez: Do we have to? We just got breakfast
Speedy: yes, cuz this is the start of our first proper chapter in this story
Can: well were out of gas so i guess we have to
Zardeez: alright fine

END OF CHAPTER 0.5

Speedy, ZardeezNuts, the Can of Coke, Panty, Stocking and Amy are in some kind of swamp. What adventures will they have? Will Speedy ever confess his feelings for Stocking? Will Zardeez be important to the plot? And will this fanfic really be a harem adventure? Find out in the first epic chapter, aka, the beginning of the Shrek Arc!

Also Speedy never realized he doesn't have a shirt anymore