I don't know why I agreed on playing this game. I have a paper due tomorrow and it is not going to do itself. Yet here I am, sitting at the party playing truth or dare with a bunch of friends.
All of this is too overwhelming, this game, paper due tomorrow, kissing Hanni earlier...
I'm sitting in the middle of the living room with an empty plastic cup in my hand. Pretty sure I'm tipsy.
"Let's play truth or dare!" Hyein says.
Eunchae starts skipping over, dodging through the other girls to find a place to sit. Danielle and Haerin follow after her, visibly holding hands and dragging one another. Soon after, the rest of the girls began sitting down on the couch.
Danielle went first after losing rock, paper, scissors and picked dare. Eunchae walked over to Danielle and whispered the dare in her ear. We were all confused when the girl turned bright red, gulping and almost begging not to publicly say it.
"Nope, you have to tell me!"
Danielle sighed, "fine..." she grabbed her phone and began typing away. She sent a text message to Eunchae and immediately hid away in embarrassment. Eunchae whipped out her phone and read the message with a sly grin. "Gosh... I knew it. You're so whipped." Danielle likes someone?
"Hanni unnie is next!" Hyein exclaimed and ignored the other two.
"Truth or dare?"
"Dare," Hanni instantly responded, shocking some of us. Eunchae, Kazuha and Hyein began snickering and laughing with one another. "Drunk Hanni is a risky Hanni, huh?" Kazuha teases.
"Shut up, just give me the dare." Hanni rolls her eyes as the three begin to whisper to one another.
"I dare you to makeout with someone in the closet, anyone of your choice." I can see everyone grinning as Hanni glances at them. Kiss someone of her choice? If she chose someone that wasn't me, isn't that two timing? No. But we're not dating...
She kissed me earlier. Was it just to play with me? DId she just want to kiss for fun? That must be it. She's drunk anyways.
Hanni looked away from them and turned around. We locked eyes as she slowly rose from the couch. I froze as I felt the others' eyes on me. I took a deep breath in as she gestured for me to come with her inside the closet.
Eunchae points towards the closet near the main bedroom. It feels like less than a second, and we're already inside the small closet with the door shut behind them.
I was locked inside my friend's closet with my best friend who I've just kissed earlier.
It's almost pitch black, although there's a bit of light from the bedroom through the little spaces between the door and the floor. Even though it is dark inside the closet, I could see Hanni licking her lips. I felt her breath exhaling against me, my heart beating so hard. Gosh, I'm so in love with her...
Hanni kisses me.
Her mouth crashes against mine, needy and desperate as she pushes me backwards and against the wall. I make a little noise of surprise against her lips. I really can't breathe, I can't do anything in general. I tried to keep up, but I even had a hard time processing that I'm kissing Hanni.
She clumsily puts her hands in my hair. She tastes like strawberries and I can't get enough. I never knew strawberries could be so addicting. My hands gravitate towards Hanni's waist. Her tongue brushed against my bottom lip as I squeezed her waist from the unexpected feeling. I almost froze and stuttered. The low noise Hanni makes into my mouth sends chills down my spine. This was too good to be real.
I become more bold as Hanni gasps into the kiss when I suck on her bottom lip. Hanni's hands moved from my hair to the back of my neck, tugging and pulling closer.
How am I supposed to look Hanni in the eye again? What happens tomorrow at school? Hanni will go back to normal, she probably won't remember a single thing. Then there's me, the complete opposite.
—
hanni. hanni. hanni.
All of my thoughts were occupied by everything that happened at the party. I remember her arms that were around me as we hugged. I can still recall how her soft lips lingered on mine. My mind is filled with her. Everything about her.
I almost forgot how Hanni was drunk and that she most likely won't remember anything.
"Minjibear, what's wrong?" I heard Hanni ask from beside me. The friend group was sitting down at the picnic table behind the school, eating our lunches together. "Do you remember anything from last night?" I asked, trying my best to stay calm.
Hanni shook her head as disappointment began bubbling up inside me. Of course...
"Why? Do you remember?" She asked. I hesitate, opening and closing my mouth a couple of times. I could feel the stares of the other girls at the table, their expressions showing pity, sympathy and other feelings I couldn't figure out.
The silence was eating me up. I shut my eyes, desperately trying to escape from this mentally, although that was clearly impossible.
I looked back at Hanni to see her already staring at me. I felt my mind going hazy, everything around me except Hanni became blurry as I held my breath. I almost forgot about the situation at hand for a second. How could I stay calm when she has the cutest expression on her face? I finally looked away, not wanting to keep the awkward eye contact.
Silence.
An awkward and uncomfortable silence engulfs the picnic table. The rest of the girls were scrolling through their phones, some starting a new conversation and laughing lightly.
After a while, everyone started to leave for their next class, leaving just Hanni and I. I could feel her staring at me nervously.
I looked at her, raising my eyebrows as she shook her head. She takes my hand from underneath the table. It hasn't even been a long time, but I can't help but think about how much I miss her. Unknown to the other girl, I was making a big deal out of holding hands.
"Min," she calls out. "Yes?" I looked up at her expectantly. "Are you... mad at me?" I widened my eyes and froze, visibly startled. She thinks I'm mad at her?
"What?"
I stared at her in surprise. I felt how uneasy and nervous she was from asking the question. "You're mad, right? Did I do anything wrong?" Hanni stopped and looked at me.
"I... I could never be mad at you!" I exclaimed, understanding that she probably feels this way because I've been ignoring her.
"Then what's wrong?" Hanni asks as she scoots closer.
"Do you really not remember what happened that night?" I ask, expecting an answer that probably won't even come. She shook her head, "Not much but these blurry images keep popping up in my head," she says.
"Of what?" I asked nervously.
I could see Hanni closing her eyes, desperately trying to remember something, anything. I nervously played with my hands and watched her anxiously, waiting for a response.
"Minji."
I felt my entire body shake from how nervous I was. She looks at me, her expression changing from confusion to uneasiness. What if she doesn't remember? Should I just tell her?
"We didn't kiss... right?"
