Do you feel my love?

Chapter 7. Do you feel my love?

Larry rolled over and, moving as carefully as possible, trying not to wake Laurent, sat on the edge of the bed with his legs dangling. He glanced over his shoulder to check that he was sound asleep. Larry got out of bed with a heavy sigh and went to the living room, where there was an exit to a small terrace with a stunning view of Paris.

Larry wrapped himself in a blanket lying on one of the wicker chairs on the terrace and, leaning his hands on the railing, trying not to think about anything, stared at the night in Paris. The Eiffel Tower in the distance shone with various lights, and various houses decorated with garlands flashed alternately, sometimes especially brightly highlighted by the headlights of rarely passing cars. In tall buildings, almost all the windows were on fire, it seemed that no one had ever slept there. It's so strange that Laurent didn't like Paris. Even more, he didn't like coming here with Larry. Even the presence of his own rather expensive apartment did not solve anything. Larry once asked his husband, "Why don't you love Paris?" Laurent just shrugged, "There are too many reminders of my past, how bad a person I was." Larry did not believe for many years that Laurent could ever be a bad person. But he was told the truth. They brought a whole stack of photos, clippings from newspapers and magazines, and a login and password from Laurent's old Facebook and Instagram accounts. Perhaps that is why at three o'clock in the morning, Larry stands on the terrace, wrapping himself in a blanket against the cold wind. He hides from his thoughts, from a possible sad future. The recent realization hit Larry like lightning. He didn't want one child, he wanted to. And not just to adopt, Larry wanted at least one of their children to have Laurent's chiseled cheekbones and gentle nature. But Laurent didn't want so many children, he wanted one, and only because Larry wanted him. Larry feared he was forcing Laurent into a future he didn't want. They are in Paris now only because Larry has a concert as part of his tour in this city. In two days he will play an hour and a half concert, why 10 more cities in Europe, and they will return to Los Angeles and contact their adoption agent. But does Laurent want this?

He is from a wealthy family. father Laurent owns two major labels, and several major clubs across America, and mother Laurent owns and runs a chain of plastic surgery clinics. Laurent said that he spent a very lonely childhood. His parents hardly participated in his life, there were almost no friends until Roy appeared in his life, and there was certainly no talk of brothers and sisters. And Larry had next to nothing by comparison. My father owns the only karaoke bar in a small town, three hours from LA. Larry is the youngest of four children. His parents for many years kept only afloat until he became a popular artist. He is the only one of his brothers who succeeded. And his family has always been supportive. Any decision Larry made, even when he decided to go to LA, with almost no chance of success.

And look how it all turned out! But now, Larry's thoughts revolved around the desire to create a large family. He wanted Laurent and him to have many children, at least three. And now this is his biggest fear, that Laurent will not support him, and will not want a big family. Perhaps even one child, Laurent's biggest concession...

— What are you doing here? — Larry winced as Laurent's arms wrapped around his body, wrapped in a fluffy plaid.

— Why are you not sleeping? — Larry tried to look normal so that Laurent wouldn't suspect anything. But they have been together for many years and Laurent has studied his husband very well.

— You know, I wake up almost immediately when you get up. I was waiting for you to return, but more than half an hour passed. — Laurent pressed closer to Larry's back, resting his chin on his shoulder.

— Laurent... — Larry said the name of her husband, not quite imagining what he would say next. He didn't want to lie, but he was afraid, to tell the truth.