• CHAPTER O N E •

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"Maybe we've been a little too guarded from things that have hurt us."

– US, keshi.


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"I am tired," she sighed, saying her thoughts out loud by accident.

"What do you mean by that?" said his soft southern voice, but devoid of any emotion.

She stared up at him, even laid out on the couch with him and she still had to look up, simply because he was that much taller than her. He was a lot of more things than her. And he'd always be that way.

"I'm just tired, of all this." She told him, she hesitated but she told him. And too emphasise her point when saying "all this" she'd stretched her arms out indicating the whole room that was an entire mess due to the party they threw last night, another party on another night.

He looked at her, his blue eyes focusing on every little detail of her face. She squirmed under those crystal eyes. They were intimidating her slightly, making her feel uneasy.

"What're you saying, Evelyn?" him using her full name made her cringe slightly.

"I'm saying that...sometimes you love ... and you learn..." she whispered.

She felt his body tense up, and saw his eyes that were showing love and caution before go cold. She saw how the vein in his neck slightly strained and his eyebrows had ever so slowly furrowed in confusion. His back had straightened drastically too and he's sat up only slightly, just enough that no one would be able to tell, but she could. She always could when it came to him.

"Evie, what're you saying exactly?" he asked her. His nick name for her making her feel more comfortable but his voice sounded as if he was being chocked for dear life. She took a deep breath, collecting her thoughts whilst doing so.

"We've grew apart. The thing is, we loved each other, and on some level we always will, but when you're young and you fall in love, you tend to think that love will supersede any problems. Realising that no matter how much you love somebody, no matter how desperately you want a relationship to work, life can act as an oxidizer and corrode it to pieces. I never once thought that would be me or you, but it is. Sometimes love fades, and I'm not the one who it's faded from." And as she told him this, her eyes filled with tears, her voice breaking half way through what she'd said, she'd dearly hope he hadn't noticed. She watched his reaction, the way his eyes lit up with surprise, pain, hurt and anger. He sat up even more, now he was tense completely and not hiding it. And then came his voice, sharper than blades.

"What do you mean 'I'm not the one who it's faded from'? Are you saying I don't love you Evie? Is that what you're fucking saying?" His eyes were now blank, his voice laced with fury. And all she could do was nod, just simply nod.

"I need you to trust me and believe me when I tell you that my heart is with you, Evie." And that was when she'd had enough. She stood up so fast she'd practically given them both whiplash. "Don't, Evie. God." He ran his hands through his hair in frustration. "Don't push me away. Losing you is the one thing I won't survive."

"How about how you show it? I'm not pushing you away, Why wouldn't you tell me about the kiss? And why didn't you call me while you were gone? And why wouldn't you ever just let me all the way in?"

And he sat there, in shock. He was frozen. How did she ever find out about that kiss? She watched the confusion and shock churn his eyes and mind. Looking down she whispered, her voice hoarse. "Chase told me. About her. About... you and her." And the way her voice sounded saying that last part, the way she'd said "you and her", it tore into him. It shattered his heart, could he even say he had a heart after hearing the pain he'd thrown her in? He didn't even know what to say anymore, the great Denver Beck was finally silenced by Evelyn Knight. Usually it was him silencing her. He opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off with a hand held up. "I need to know." She whispered. "I need to know what happened. I need to know everything. About the trip, about what you'd done. About... her." Swallowing the lump that formed in her throat, Evelyn took a deep breath, preparing herself for the worst. Gently she closed her eyes, just for a few moments so that she'd be able to compose herself. She had no idea that he was watching her though, studying the way her fists were clenched making her knuckles turn white with how tight she'd began to clench them, her nails creating little quarter moon shaped indents on her skin, her breathing at a different pace than it usually was, her eyes clenched to stop the tears from rolling down her face. So he took a breath, stood up next to her only to have her sit down but he stayed standing and told her, he told her everything that happened. Everything that had occurred between himself and Fiona. How he'd met her at a party, how she'd got his attention with her provocative dance moves, especially when his mind and body were completely intoxicated. But he hadn't slept with her, even intoxicated he'd never do that to his Evie. His Evie that's like perfection just in her tiny ass like 5 ft' body. His Evie's just a tiny ball of perfection, and he can't seem to get enough of her. He could talk to her for a week nonstop, and he still wouldn't be tired of her. It's just like every word that she says is interesting. If she wrote 100 books. He'd read all of them. Even if they sucked, because he'd still love them. She gets kind of insecure sometimes, but he doesn't understand why. He wished she would wake up next to him, they wouldn't even have to have sex or anything, and he just wants to be in the same room as her. She's really weird, and likes some weird ass things. She's also extremely funny, and he loves that. She's everything a guy could ever want.

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