The Edge

Gideon: Part Nine

Helen didn't say what she and John had talked about. Gideon barely noticed. He was too wrapped up in his own emotions, in the feeling of his heart pounding against his ribs. He kept running over what Matthias had said, over and over. This has nothing to do with you. He's harmless.

Gideons didn't believe that–couldn't believe that–even as the awareness that he had no reason not to hammered away at him. Why couldn't he just accept that this was a wrong place, wrong time situation? That the man was desperate, but not necessarily dangerous? What was wrong with him?

"Uh," Luca said warily, "that doesn't look good."

He was looking up at the sky. It had gone reddish brown as the haze of approaching sand blocked out the setting sun. "Everyone stay close," Helen said. "We need to get inside."

Buildings closed up around them–shutters down, doors locked, all with a brisk efficiency that said this kind of thing happened a lot. The sand started to fill the air as they reached the ship, enough so that they had to cover their mouths. They were shaking it out of their hair and clothes when they stepped inside. "This plant sucks," Arian grumbled.

"They've all sucked," Adoette countered. "I'm going to check the cameras. I don't trust that fence lock."

"Good plan," Helen said. It was the sound of her voice that finally caught Gideon's attention. She sounded so quiet, hollow. "I'll get the next jump charted."

"You good?"

"I'm fine." Her speed-walking away said otherwise. The rest of them exchanged glances, but no one went after her. Probably for the best, Gideon thought as he shook the last bits of sand from his hair. There was no telling what overturning that rock would reveal. He sure wasn't equipped to handle it.

Unfortunately, Helen leaving left him wide open to be grilled. Matteo at least had the decency to follow him away from the others before he started asking questions. "Are you okay?" he said. "Anything we should be worried about?"

"I'm keeping it together," Gideon said. He hoped it didn't sound so transparently false as it felt.

"That's not...entirely what I meant. If that kid is going to cause us problems, I want to know."

Oh. He meant Matthias. "I don't think so." But did he really? Gideon wasn't sure what to think of anything anymore. He rubbed his eyes and sighed heavily. "He's fine. Someone tried to see John early. I lost my temper because I thought that guy followed us. He was trying to de-escalate. That's all."

"Okay." Matteo's head tilted slightly. "Do you need a break from this?"

"I don't think I can take a break from this."

"Obviously not all of this, but you could stay on the ship. Not be so..." Matteo gestured back towards the door. "...out there, if you think it will help?"

Gideon raised an eyebrow. "After the last few planets we've been to? You really think that's a good idea?" Just sitting on the ship would make him feel worse. He couldn't risk losing another sibling. And who's going to protect them if not me?

"Yeah, actually," Matteo said. "I know you're trying to protect us, but you can't do that when you're so tense. What do you really think about that guy? Do you really think he's going to be an issue? And if so, a you level issue?"

That was the problem: Gideon didn't know how to answer the question. He was used to trusting his gut in situations like this, but the situation had gotten out of hand fast. His gut thought everything was wrong. It was nothing but frayed wires and misfiring signals in there. He couldn't trust anything anymore.