Chapter Twelve: You've Changed

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NINE MONTHS LATER....

SOLANA POV

After Chris and I got back from our honeymoon, we had to deal with the wrath of our families

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After Chris and I got back from our honeymoon, we had to deal with the wrath of our families. They didn't appreciate that we up and eloped without including them which we understood, but we followed our hearts and promised them that we would have a more intimate ceremony for everyone to attend. The media of course had a field day with the news, but I couldn't worry about that because I've been wrapping up my second studio album. As much I want to say the process has been blissful, it's been problematic because I've been adjusting to being a wife, and that includes tending to my husband, and stepchildren, and figuring out how to be the best artist I can be. 

Chris wants to expand our family and I don't want to...at least not now. We haven't been on the same page for a while, so he can forget that. He's touring back to back and I can't help but feel like he's cheating. My mom says unless I have concrete proof, I shouldn't jump to conclusions. However, I was right about one thing: the novelty of our marriage is wearing off. After dropping my sweet RoRo off to her mother Nia, I went to the recording studio to record a track with my homies Don Toliver and Bad Bunny. As soon as the music dropped, we started singing...

Guess I been used to being used like this
Ain't no difference, I'm immortalized in my thoughts
Praise to the most high for protection
Over my most prized possessions
Talkin' 'bout my sanity's at a 6.7
Handing out poinsettias
To my dead homie mothers, prayin' they feel better
Might get shit mindin' my business
Might get shit sharing my vision
Might as well, can't tell if it's even worth
Conversation, need a prayer, do it even work?
All that's for real, it's forever
Moments stolen taste better
I've been ridin', ridin' through this cold world
Thought you had another, went and caught up with ol' girl
I feel like it's over
Somethings callin' to get closer
I'm out of touch, I need your love, oh, it's a mile away
Need you once girl, once girl, we're goin' out the way
I feel like it's over
Something callin' to get closer
Countin' my blessings twice as much
Let death stress me too much
Can't hide from pressure, too worried I'm living a lie
Can't trust nobody you ain't been broke with
Yeah, 'cause I don't break my focus, bitch, I'm Obi Wan
You caught in the maze, I
Thought it'd be easy to get myself on
I need it, but it takes time
And I'm out of patience, I burnt it with you
Can't lose myself to your ego, I wanna say
Love me better when you try less
I don't take much, just need your honesty, oh
Love will work better when you confess
Feelings don't need discussion
Spend my life discoverin' new shit
I've been ridin', ridin' through this cold world
Thought you had another, went and caught up with ol' girl
I feel like it's over
Something's callin' to get closer
I'm out of touch, I need your love, oh, it's a mile away
Need you once girl, once girl, we're goin' out the way
I feel like it's over
Something callin' to get closer


After a quick break, I scrolled down my Instagram feed and saw Chris photographed with some girls who weren't either me or any of the BMs. 

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