Stardust Chords || Greta Van Fleet

Chapter 3: That Would Never Be Me

Jake's P.O.V

I was so happy to be back on the road again.

When we spent too much down time at home, I could feel myself slowly started to drift into the way things were before the band, and I told myself that that was just not something I would ever be into.

All of my friends were finally at that age when they were thinking about settling down and starting families, and I'm sure it was nice for them, but that was just never something that interested me. I was meant to be on the road, never staying in cities long enough to know their names, waking up on buses and falling in love with new faces every night, only to leave them again in the morning.

And I was happy.

The night before we left, our friend Miles had told us that he was planning on proposing to his long time girlfriend, and nothing made me want to run back onto the tour bus and go. I don't know what it was, but one by one I saw everyone around me that I once admired for their passion and drive, slowly but surely lose their spark once they accepted their inevitable fate of "settling down." They masked their disappointment with forced smiles and encouraging words of how excited they were for the future, but all I could hear was another quitter.

And that would never be me.

With the life I lead, with the life I wanted to lead, there just wasn't room for it. It wouldn't be fair, to have someone tying me down, waiting up for me at home, especially when I couldn't be there for them. It was just better for me to remain unattached forever. And I had accepted that. I enjoyed it. It's saved me plenty of heartbreak over the years, something else I had seen my friends go through time and time again.

It just never seemed worth it. And from what I could tell, there wasn't anyone out there who could ever make it worth it. I was a simple guy. As long as I had my guitar, I was happy.

Before leaving the bus, I put on my sunglasses, hoping to hide was lingered of my hangover from this morning. If we knew how to do anything, it was celebrate before a tour. Unfortunately, it was starting to hit me harder and harder each time, and the last thing I wanted was for the fans to think I wanted to be anywhere else but right there. Aside from playing, they were the ones that made this all worth it, and I wanted to show up for them, the same way they always showed up for us. They were the only loves I needed.

As I turned the knob, I could already hear the screams from outside. I couldn't help but smile, but tried my best to contain my grin as I carefully pushed it open, peeking out to see a line of people had already formed in front of the venue. I couldn't believe how many people cared enough to get here so early. They'd never know how much it meant to me that they believed in us like this, so I always made a point to go out and talk to as many as I could. They inspired me just as much as they say I inspire them, which was still hard to comprehend.

In my mind, I was just a guy who played guitar, and somehow it brought me here.
I was so lucky.

"Hey guys!" I called out, flashing them a nervous smile and an enthusiastic wave. I don't know what it was, but I always got a little nervous before meeting fans. Maybe it was because I knew they put me on such a high pedestal, and I never wanted to let them down, or maybe it was because I knew I could never live up to the vision they all had of me in their heads.

But that didn't mean I couldn't try.

"Thanks so much for coming out, it really means a lot to us." I said, making my way down the line, smiling for as many photos as they wanted, signing whatever they held out in front of me.
"Of course! We can't wait for the show! This is our third one."
"Three?! That's incredible. I hope we always live up to your expectations." I laughed, now feeling more nervous. The more faith they put in us, the more pressure I felt.

I just wanted to give them something to believe in.
I wanted to make them proud.

"You guys are so incredible. I can't wait to see you out there tonight." I giggled, leaning in for another photo.
"Did the girl on your team tell you about us? Is that why you came out?" One asked. I peeked over at her, giving her a questioning look.
"What girl?" I asked.
"She was unloading the bus, she said if she saw you she'd tell you to come out and see us." They laughed. I felt my cheeks burn.

The girl from this morning.
Jade.

I don't know what it was, but there was something about her that made me linger, shaking her hand a little longer, maintain our stare, feeling my face get hot. I couldn't remember the last time a girl made me blush like that. I hated it. But she also made me laugh, something else I also couldn't remember.

After these past few tours, it always felt like girls had an ulterior motive, never actually liking me for me, but rather what I could do for them, or how they'd look if people thought we were together, so I just avoided it. It was better than the alternative.

But.. she didn't seem like that, not from that one interaction anyway. This was her job. She met guys like he every day. And it seemed like that tool bag of a tour manager was her boyfriend, so.. it didn't even matter anyway.

But.. she was pretty. There was no denying that. Her jet black hair perfectly falling over her shoulders, her piercing brown eyes, almost a blinding gold, like melted honey on a hot Summer day.

I quickly shook the thought.
"Oh, um.. y-yeah." I lied. "She did, she told me how nice you all were so.. I had to come see for myself." They all giggled amongst each other.
"She seems really sweet. Is she with you for the rest of this tour?" I nodded, even though I wasn't entirely sure.
"Uh, yeah I think so. So.. that's good that you like her." I laughed. "I'll see you guys in there okay? I gotta go sound check, but if I see the rest of the guys I'll be sure to let them know you want to see them." They all nodded enthusiastically.
"Thanks Jake!" I gave them another wave before making my way inside.

I could hear talking coming from the stage, instantly going silent as I made my way around the corner to see Jade and her boyfriend up on the stage. I had seen enough roadies to be able to tell the difference between a good one and a bad one, and her boyfriend wasn't fooling anyone with the way he was standing around those drums, no doubt delegating his job to everyone around him. I wondered if he was just lazy, or if he didn't actually know what he was doing.

"Hey." I called out, making my way over and hopping up on stage. Jade peeked up at me while continuing to unwrap the cables for the guitars on the stand, perfectly plugging them into the amps. I could tell she had done this before. That was reassuring.

"Hey." She said softly, diverting her attention again.
"Hey!" The boyfriend said, flashing me a wide grin. "You all settled in?" He asked. I nodded, avoiding his stare as I looked around, trying to double check everything without him realizing. The last thing I needed was for things not to run smoothly just because he was neglagent. But part of me had hope that anything he didn't do, Jade would clean up his mess.

"Um. Yeah. Just.. ready for sound check." I said, trying my best not to stare as Jade pushed her self up, making her way over towards my side of the stage.
"You know, um.. this is where I play." I said, going over and inspecting my guitar on the rack. She gave me a subtle smile, nodding.
"Yeah, I recognized the guitar, so.." She said, her voice trailing off.
"Yeah, I'm.. I'm sorry about before, I just.. I get a little-"
"That's okay. That's your instrument. I understand." She said simply. I nodded, feeling my face get hot again.

"Y-yeah.. well, um.. thanks for all your hard work. Everything looks great, Jade." I said, quickly avoiding her eyes and heading backstage.
"Thanks, Jake!" I heard from behind me. I turned around, giving a half wave.
"Yeah, um.. thanks Nathan." I said. His face dropped.
"It's Noah."