Dirt Lifter | Craig of the Creek High School AU

Bitemarks

(Content warning: Self harm. Summary at end of chapter.)

It was not the worst day ever. He's had a lot worse days where he felt a lot worse, and done a lot more damage for future days.

It was still pretty bad, though. The worst day in a while.

Jason's problems started yesterday. He got home too late last night and forgot to set his alarm, so he woke up ten minutes before he had to get on the bus, and he was still tired. He was in a rush to leave while not completely awake yet, and he picked a random shirt from his drawer, as well as his jeans from yesterday off the floor, and he didn't realize until he got on the bus that he picked up a half-sleeved shirt, not a full sleeved shirt. He also did not grab a jacket.

It's not the worst damage. He's been doing well with the whole "don't cut yourself" thing for a while. He's kept busy with work and school and actually having some kind of social life, and it's easier to avoid doing it when he knew he would have to hide it. He had also moved on from his arms to easier-to-hide places, when he eventually broke down and did it.

But there were still old, faded and precise scars covering his forearms that were very, very visible to anyone who knew where to look, and everyone knew where to look. The entire student body knew, and even if they didn't say anything to his face, Jason could feel their stares pricking at his skin and their whispers in the hallways. 15-year-old Jason hadn't cared about hiding anything, and that meant every single student at Herkleton High had seen him at his worst.

He was an apathetic little shit back then, at least at school and with scars, but he was the exact opposite of apathetic now. His hands were already shaking, and he hadn't even left the bus yet.

So current, 17-year-old Jason hid, arms straight down, stuck to his sides, trying not to think about it too much so his hands would stop trembling. He ditched most of his morning classes to hide in the bathroom, leaving right after attendance was taken. He would have stayed in the library, like he used to, but he was somewhat close with Stacks now and didn't know her schedule and how to avoid her.

He ate his lunch in the E-hall bathroom, which was very gross, but this was the one bathroom no one vaped in because it was by the principal's office, so he would be left alone. And he was left alone, like he was a freshman again, with short sleeves and cuts exposed like he was a freshman again.

The bell rang for the final time and he was dismissed from all of the after-lunch classes he didn't go to. He went straight to the middle of the bus where nobody sat.

He finally got home after an entire lifetime of waiting, and he opened the door, took off his shoes, unzipped his backpack and-

"Alright, I'll ask him- he's here now, hold on, Alyssa."

His dad turned the corner before Jason even had time to stop pulling his lunchbox out of his bag. "Jason, are you working tonight?"

His father looked at him, and Jason saw his eyes go from his face to his outstretched and exposed arm and then back to his face.

His brain flipped its breaker box as soon as he heard his dad's voice, so he stood, frozen solid in place, arms still in front of him as his mouth moved on autopilot. "Yeah, I'm working."

"Okay. Yes, he's working, so call Ms. Gooden to feed your dogs. No," he said into the phone he was holding, turning and walking into the dining room. "I'm not going to call her for you, you can do that yourself."

Jason bolted up the stairs and into his room, not even bothering to empty his lunchbox. He threw his bag on his bed, and shut and locked the door behind him. Why was his dad home? His dad should not have been home, it was far too early for him to be home. But explanation didn't matter now, what mattered was that he saw, he saw his cuts, he knows his only child, who was already a complete waste of space, also sliced up his arms because he's a suicidal bitch, and he's going to call a psych ward or a military academy or something to shove him in, and Jason will be trapped in another place without any friends and labeled an antisocial and unstable freak again. He's had stress dreams about this, and his dreams were not allowed to happen in real life.