Recently, I had a past lover come back into my life. I am unsure of his intentions, unsure of why someone younger and so handsome would want me? I am trying to go with the flow but it's been so long since I've let someone in, it's like I forgot how to. My heart has broken many times, so I have built this wall up so high.... I'm not sure someone would be willing to climb that distance. I want to take him in my arms and let him touch me, without jumping around like I'm trying to avoid being stabbed by a knife. Have you ever been so long without touch or love that you literally can't, your mind and body won't let you? I guess it boils down to I am afraid. Afraid of him touching me and thinking, "wow! She's got a little chunkier since the last time" or it's just if I let him in just a little bit, heartbreak is eminent. I don't know if I can handle it.
I decided I cannot.
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Random thoughts that are swept under the rug
Non-FictionI guess this one started out as things i wanted to get out, but just can't for some reason. Things that are bothering me about myself, or others. Things that i don't understand. I don't know really. :(
